#i will not fix her i will be there for her until the end of time

[traveler-at-heart]

Hot and Cold

Summary: Natasha's playing with fire when a new resident joins the Compound.

A/N: Queen of Angst @esposadejoyhuerta asked for the fluffiest, sweetest, tooth rotting story ever and I was happy to deliver, even after they changed their request to inclue jealousy BECAUSE no one can stop me. Love ya, baby!

Another day, another mission. Since last week’s mess, it seems like Fury’s been finding ways to torture the team.

Yes, at the end they were able to retrieve the drive with the data of over twenty enhanced individuals. But so did HYDRA. And now the Avengers are on a race against time to locate them before the Russians do.

Natasha walks to Fury’s office, not excited at the prospect of risking her life to recruit people who didn’t really want to be found.

“Yes?” she says as soon as Fury turns around. He hands over a very heavy binder. “Is this their criminal record?”

Great, a weirdo with a troubled past. Natasha might not make it out alive.

“No, that’s their academic stuff. She’s a scientist. Crazy smart” Fury explains. “Have you heard of Bio-Thermokinesis?”

“No, not really”

“The ability to manipulate the body temperature of oneself and/or others” he recites, having learned the concept just now.

“That doesn’t sound so bad” Natasha says, closing the folder. It’s certainly better than the last few people she had to chase down.

“Yeah, until she induces a heat stroke or hypothermia” Fury scoffs. “We’ve been failing at recruiting these people. It would be nice to have a win. Plus, she could work in the lab with Banner and Stark”

“I don’t think Nerd Club is worth one’s freedom” Natasha mutters, skimming through the file.

“Well, either way, this mission doesn’t requires strenght. It requires charm. You up for it or should I send Hill?”

As Natasha gets to the picture of the target, she looks up.

“I’ll handle it”

—

As usual, you’re carrying more than you can possibly handle. Books, your laptop, a sandwich from the cafeteria, and correspondence from the main office.

By the time you manage to open the door to your office, half of the things in your arms are dangerously close to scattering across the hardwood floor.

“Oh, shit” you mutter when your keys drop.

“Need a hand?” a voice says and you jump back, the rest of your stuff flying across the room. 

“Uh… can I help you?” you say, because the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen is perched up on your desk, legs crossed and a playful smirk across her striking features.

“Are you Doctor Y/L/N?”

“Yes. How did you…? I’m pretty sure the door was locked” 

Is she a thief? You have absolutely nothing of value, at least not for a conventional burglar. You run every possibility in your mind and then you land on your second least favorite one.

Natasha notices the room getting warmer, probably because of how flustered you got. The file seems accurate regarding your power.

“AC broke down?” she asks innocently, undoing the top button of her shirt.

“Uh… I… I’ll open the window” you say, pushing it and leaning against the window pain. You consider jumping down to escape, but it’s a considerable height. You take a breath, deciding to face the matter head on. “So, which agency sent you?”

“Ever heard of S.H.I.E.L.D.?”

“Yes, that was my first guess” you admit with a sad smile. “What can I do for you, Agent…?”

“Call me Natasha” she says, hopping off the desk. “I’m afraid I am the bearer of bad news… and a generous offer”

“Mmm” you nod, fixing your glasses. 

“A tactical team was sent to stop the purchase of confidential information for 30 enhanced individuals. We were able to obtain it… and so did HYDRA”

“Listen” you raise your hand, taking off your glasses and pinching the bridge of your nose. “I get it. HYDRA and S.H.I.E.L.D. know about me. The thing is, my power isn’t something you can leverage in a fight. I doubt they’ll be very interested in me”

“I think you’re wrong. And it’s not just your ability. Your expertise in science and your genetic makeup can be used to experiment”

“So, is that what S.H.I.E.L.D. wants to do with me?” you sigh, looking out the window. You’re enjoying the view, vaguely aware that life as you know it is over.

“We want to offer you shelter at the Avengers Compound. 24 hour security, top facilities and technology. You can continue your research” Natasha says, trying to make it sound like a great deal.

It brings her back to that time Fury told her it was either work for the US government or end up in the Raft.

Your offer is slightly better, but a golden prison is still a prison.

“Are there any questions I can answer before you make a decision?” she offers with a kinder tone.

“Yeah. Do I even have a choice?”

—

Academic life is all you’ve ever known. Grants were the perfect way to do your research without having to look for a benefactor and expose yourself. You could learn things about your DNA, your abilities, while doing other stuff without anyone noticing.

Now, you wake up and there’s nothing that drives you. You live with people who have exceptional skills, physical prowess, and military training. Their world is avenging, your world is scientific papers and books.

Sure, their lab is nice, but most of the times you end up leaving early, completely unmotivated and feeling empty. 

Natasha watches from afar, and although this isn’t her doing, she feels responsible. She tries to include you in activities she understands, like training, but you’re very obviously not the athletic kind.

Banner is, as usual, isolating himself and Tony speaks nerd, but is barely around unless a mission requires his presence. 

It isn’t until one day that Peter shows up to the Compound that Natasha gets an idea.

“Hi, Miss Romanoff. Is Mister Stark around?” he asks in that shy tone he always uses when he’s around Natasha.

“Nope, not to my knowledge. Do you need anything?” 

“FRIDAY told me to meet him here. He must have forgotten. I guess I better get back to my Biochem project”

Wait a minute.

He’s a nerd.

“Stay” she says, looking him up and down. Peter reminds her of a puppy when he stops completely, as if he learned a new command. “Wait for Tony at the lab. I’ll try to find him”

“You’re sure? I’m not allowed inside by myself” he hesitates, following Natasha.

“Yeah, it’s fine” she types in the access code, and of course, there you are, spinning in your chair.

As soon as you hear the door opening, you stop your movements, almost falling off.

Natasha finds your blush adorable.

“Hey, Y/N. This is Peter. He’ll be around waiting for Tony”

“Oh, hey. Ok, I was just leaving. I’m kinda stuck either way”

“Ordinary Differential Equations?” Peter says as soon as he gets his eyes on your board.

“Yes. Very impressive” you nod. “This is focused on genetic network. I’m trying to determine inborn errors of metabolism”

“Oh, you know? There’s a brilliant Doctor who’s working on that, maybe her paper would be great for you. She’s Y/N Y/L/N”

“Yeah, that’s me” you say, tapping your chin and examining the board. “What is your ability? If you have any? Maybe I can use a different set of data”

“Yes! I would love to, what do you need from me?” Peter says, a little starstruck at finding out you’re one of the most prestigious researchers in the world. 

“For now, a blood sample” you wink at him, adjusting your glasses.

Natasha sits in the back of the lab as you and Peter work together, and you explain every concept to him. This is the first time since you arrived that you don’t look so miserable.

The Russian takes it as a small win when you join her in the common area for dinner.

--

Since Peter found out about your abilities and your permanent stay at the Compound, you’ve been advising him on his project and college applications. Which is a really nice distraction, but it also makes you miss your own college days.

So, even if you’re in a better mood, it’s still hard to socialize with the team.

One day, you enter the lab to find Rogers, Wilson and Barnes looking at a screen, while Natasha types.

“Whoever encrypted this is slightly smarter than me. Only slightly” 

They look away as you drag a chair to focus on your own stuff, a cup of coffee in your hand and a cookie in your mouth.

“Hi…” you wave at them, feeling intimidated as usual.

“Hey, weather girl” Sam winks at you. 

Natasha rolls her eyes and elbows him.

“Ignore him, Y/N”

You can tell she’s getting frustrated, so you inch closer, looking at the code over her shoulder. Placing your hand on her elbow, you silently ask for permission to take over.

The redhead eyes you curiously, but stops typing and moves the keyboard your way. It takes you twenty seconds to hack into the files.

“How…?”

“I used to hack into databases to make sure my name wasn’t on any watchlist” you explain casually. Natasha laughs at that. “Anyway, there you go”

“Thanks, Y/N. You’re my hero” Natasha says, smiling up at you. Her tone makes you blush and you nod, going back to your desk.

“Nice work. We could use your help if you’re free some other time” Steve says as they leave the lab.

“Of course, Capitan” 

—

An intruder changes your mind about training. The threat is handled swiftly and you don’t even have time to hide before F.R.I.D.A.Y. confirms the suspect has been taken into custody

But you don’t even know how to begin to defend yourself, so you come back to Natasha, asking if her offer still stands.

Needless to say, the spy is more than happy to train you. Not just because it means you’re comfortable asking for things, but because Natasha can teach you something that will help you protect yourself.

You start with two sessions per week, which later turns to four, until you’re comfortable with training almost daily.

The rest of the team joins from time to time, giving you advice and helping you when Natasha’s away on missions.

After a few weeks, Natasha notices how your resistance is better and you’re building some muscle.

Only as a professional observation. It’s not like she finds you attractive, with that nerdy charm and toned arms.

One day, as you’re leaving the gym, she checks her bag, cursing when she notices she forgot a change of clothes. 

“Wanna borrow one of my hoodies?” you offer, handing over your NYU sweatshirt.

“You sure?” Natasha hesitates.

“Yeah, I got tons of these. From all the places I’ve done work or research” 

“I’ll give it back” she promises, taking it.

That turns out to be a lie.

A few days later, when you’re folding your laundry, F.R.I.D.A.Y. requests that you join Tony and Banner in the lab. Leaving the basket in the living room, you think nothing of it, nor do you notice that a couple of your sweatshirts are gone.

It all comes to light a week later, when Natasha comes back from a grueling mission. The only thing that will make her feel better is staying in her room while wearing your UCLA hoodie.

She totally forgets about her attire when she answers the door.

“Huh, so that’s where it was” you tilt your head, smiling.

“I…”

“I’m watching a movie, care to join me? It’s one of your favorites” 

“Ok” she nods, surprised that you’re not mad about the stolen sweatshirt. 

Natasha enters your room, appreciating the combination of books, notes and the board with equations. After you apologize for the mess, you offer a place to sit in your bed.

“It looks good on you” you compliment the redhead. Natasha smiles, trying to be nonchalant about it.

“Thank you” 

It becomes a habit, to steal your hoodies.

“Objectively speaking, you don’t actually need them as you can regulate your temperature” Natasha comments one day, digging through your closet. To her shock, she finds a sweatshirt with a sorority logo on it.

“Not mine. A girl I hooked up with in college” you explain.

Natasha rolls her eyes, throwing the garment as far away as possible while pulling a face. You laugh at her reaction.

“Don’t be jealous, Natty. You’re my favorite” you promise, unaware of the effect your words had on her.

“And yet you never let me wear the Harvard one”

“That was my first” you shrug your shoulders.

“First college or first hook up?” Natasha taunts and you laugh.

“A nerd never kisses and tell. Actually, a nerd rarely kisses anyone to being with” you try to joke, pulling out the Harvard sweatshirt from your closet to put it on.

Natasha eyes it, and you catch her intentions a little too late. She inches forward and you stretch your arm back, trying to place the hoodie out of reach.

“Nu-uh” you shake your head, laughing as she keeps trying to steal it. “Natasha, there are like ten other hoodies you  could take!” 

“I want this one!” she insists, jumping. Her body crashes against yours, and you both stumble, falling in your bed. Limbs are tangled and her laugh tickles your ear as she struggles to lift herself up. After a moment, Natasha smiles, looking at your lips. “Gotcha”

You don’t even know what to say, her intense stare making you feel warm -both literally and figuratively - and your heart beats faster when it seems like she’ll lean forward and kiss you.

“Agent Romanoff, there’s an urgent call for you” FRIDAY interrupts the moment. 

Natasha sighs, standing up and looking at you. 

“Catch you later?”

“Yeah” you nod, trying to hide your disappointment.

—

Natasha was gone for a week, and returned with a very bad injury. You heard the news as Steve and Tony were arguing in the kitchen, blaming each other as usual.

“Where…? Is she ok…?” you try to interrupt them, but they’re in the middle of a screaming match.

“Come with me” Maria says, taking you to a whole different wing of the Compound. Since you’ve never been on missions, you didn’t know about the Medbay.

Natasha’s lying in a hospital bed, asleep.

“She’s ok. A guy threw a knife at her, but it was only a superficial stab wound. Doctor said she’ll be discharged tomorrow” Maria eases your nerves. 

Of course, for her it’s easy to say it’s no big deal. Agents are shot, blown up, killed in the field. A little scratch is nothing, especially for Natasha. But you take a deep breath, leaving the Medbay in a rush.

As you lock yourself in the Avenger’s Lab, you make F.R.I.D.A.Y. a simple request.

“Show me the mission’s footage”

—

Natasha’s had worst, truly. But still, her head is throbbing when she wakes up. The doctor discharges her with the instruction to rest for a week. No training either.

The Russian notices a bag with clothes on the chair next to her bed. She finds your Harvard sweatshirt, which puts a tiny smile on her face.

You are nowhere to be found in the Compound when she returns, so she goes to her room to take another nap, the painkillers making her sleepy.

By the time Natasha wakes up to get something to eat, F.R.I.D.A.Y. requests her presence in the lab.

“What is it?” she says, surprised to find you working on a tablet. It looks like you haven’t slept in the last 24 hours, five or six cups of coffee around the various tables in the lab.

“I created a new technology for your suit” you jump right to it. “It has motion sensors that are triggered by incoming threats. That way, if someone tries to sneak up on you, you can either get an alert or program a defense mechanism that can be shot from any part of the suit” 

Natasha takes the tablet, running the simulation. She’s impressed with the level of detail you’ve placed on this and on such short time. She’s about to thank you, but you’re already asleep in the couch of the lab, clearly exhausted from all the work you’ve done.

The sight of your sleeping form makes Natasha’s heart flutter.

—

Movie night is the one tradition you’ve always been on board with. Coincidentally, it’s Natasha’s least favorite. Depending on her mood, she’ll join everyone on the living room, or talk you into watching something else in your room or hers.

Tonight, she stops by once the movie has already started. As usual, you’re on the couch in the far back of the room, your glasses reflecting the screen as you eat some popcorn.

“Hey” Natasha leans over the back of the couch and whispers against your ear, making you jump. Your eyes follow her as she jumps over to plop down next to you.

“You’re not supposed to be doing that with a hole on your side, Natasha” you reprimand. 

“It’s fine” she lies, grabbing some popcorn.

As the movie keeps going, the woman inches closer to you. At first you think she’s settling in her seat, but then her hand spreads on the back of the couch, dangerously close to your neck.

It’s fine. You can handle it.

Nope, you absolutely can’t. Not when you feel Natasha’s nimble fingers playing with the hairs on the back of your neck, her digits alternating between caressing the skin and scratching your scalp.

“You’re hot” she whispers at some point and you turn to look at her, dazed.

“Huh?”

“You feel hot” she clarifies a second later, her eyes looking at your lips. “Is everything ok? Those powers of yours are acting up”

“I’m fine” you nod, looking back at the screen. Aware that you are in fact increasing the temperature in the room, you take a breath and close your eyes, before anyone else notices.

You’re almost back to normal when Natasha stretches and lies across your lap, her left hand squeezing your thigh as the other one begins to trace patterns in your skin.

All while she's wearing your Harvard sweatshirt.

Your only thought is to take it off, along with the rest of her clothes and kiss every inch of her body.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., is the thermostat broken…?” Tony finally snaps, annoyed at the sudden changes in temperature. “Never mind” 

Everyone follows his eyes as he looks to the back of the room, where Natasha is playing dumb while riling you up.

“Can you two find a room to turn into a sauna and spare the rest of us?” Tony says, which makes your eyes widen, and the room practically turns into a freezer. “Great, now we’re all turning into popsicles. Cap, you’re familiar with the feeling, right?”

“Don’t be so dramatic, Tony” Natasha finally stands up, showing you some mercy. “Come on, detka” 

“Uh, ok” you say, your voice barely a whisper as you allow the woman to drag you back to her room.

As soon as the door is shut, she pushes you against it.

“So, tell me” she says with a playful smile. “How hot do you think it will get here?”

You can only shake your head, speechless. Natasha smiles, kissing you softly. All thoughts leave your head, opening your mouth to give her access. You’ll do anything she asks, anything at all.

“I see” she smiles when the room gets hot. “Good thing we won’t have our clothes on” 

It’s the best sex of your life.

So much so, the fire alarm goes off in the entire Compound.

“Fucking worth it” you sigh as you’re both naked in bed, the water from the sprinklers evaporating from all the heat in the room.

[hcneymooners]

⋆ you pull my hair, you call me.

jinx x mermaid!f!reader. men & minors dni.

synopsis: you are a mermaid living in a hidden grotto of the undercity. one day, jinx wanders into your territory. or more accurately, the ruins of her old haunt.

cw: mermaid!reader, canon divergence!au, discussions of trauma, discussion of child loss, mental health issues, non-sexual intimacy, sfw, however, there are suggestive themes, age gap, girl you are literally thousands of years old.

notes: in these coming days, i hold on tightly to fantasies. they become stronger, more intricate. i feel it is my only way to survive. this is dedicated to @s-4pphics, the only person who makes me feel like a real life mermaid.

The water remembers everything. It's why you were born into it. Your mind is a steel trap, a lattice of love and loss.

Water does not coddle the memory, but it soothes. When your mother crawled into the reservoir to birth you, it did not coddle her naked body as it twisted and expelled you. It did nothing to lessen the sore peaks of her nipples as her breasts swelled and hardened with milk. But it soothed.

Your birth was similar to the experience of having birds flutter out of one’s chest. You came into the world with the rush of wind and at the peak of death, eyes big and your silence even larger. You were a beautiful baby with a delicately scaled face, and from the beginning your mother knew you were different.

She holds you, tells you her name—a name that means one thousand flowers. It fits her; you understand this even one minute fresh into your life. Your mother was one thousand flowers both blooming and decaying at once.

You were born in the winter, snow touching the tender skin of your forehead. It is also winter when your mother, a woman of a thousand flowers, dies.

Her body seems to flutter and pulse until it shudders into foam. The water soothes you as you sink. You stay on the ocean floor for what is close to forever. The years pass, but water remembers.

It remembers the screaming, the fire, the way the undercity shattered like a dropped mirror. The shards spun out and out. You never braved the world, then. You would come close to the surface, float backward and bent as you watched the sky smear into green gas and heat. The water—and therefore you—remember the taste of ash and gunpowder, the iron-rich flavor of blood and revenge.

But mostly, you remember her—that odd girl with chaos pumping inside of her like a second, third heart who came stumbling through the wreckage of her old workshop, trailing ghosts and grief like a burial shroud.

You've been watching her for days. Your kind has always been drawn to broken things, to the places where pain bleeds into water until you can't tell where one ends and the other begins. She fascinates you with her paleness, with her long body that is painted and bared by the shoddy work of her pants and the cut of her top. You hide behind large chunks of driftwood, eye the swivel of her hips as she paces and turns. Her eyes are strange, too pale ghosts colored silvery blue. She closes them, opens, closes.

She is like a small bird, this woman. She carries destruction in her hands but cradles it like a wounded animal at times, afraid to hold too tight, afraid to let go. The first time she breaks, it's like watching a star collapse.

She falls to her knees at the water's edge, her wail echoing off the mineral-crusted walls of what was once her sanctuary. Her hands tear and tug at her braids as if she could rip the memories right out of her skull, like plucking loose the weave of a tapestry. The water around you shivers with her anguish, and your body preens; it tells you that you cannot stay hidden any longer.

You rise from the depths like a dream, your hair carrying traces of phosphorescent algae that provide a lazy glow as it swirls around your face. Her eyes fix on you, fever-bright and wild, but she doesn't run. Maybe she thinks you're a hallucination. Maybe she's just too tired to be afraid. 

You understand this.

The silence lasts for a while. The two of you exist across from one another, your face settling on your hands as you inch forward. She has yet to notice the flutter of your tail, but it's only a matter of time. You can see the light refracting off of it into a million sparks of light, dancing across the ceiling as you near her.Her mouth parts and you feel your own hinge open. You are trying to remember, trying to make yourself just like her if only to assuage her fear. Your tongue unfurls, neat and a deep blue. She blinks in surprise, which allows you to speak first.

"I am [Name]," you say, and your voice is a gentle purr like someone has stumbled over the strings of a harp. You are learning, thinking of how humans relate to one another. You don't tell her your real name, your name birthed by ocean and the melt of your mother's scale in the middle of your tongue. You are a woman of a thousand white waves, because every woman in your family has a thousand of something. "This, here, is my home."

You reach out now, because you have seen this before. Her people hug and grasp at one another in welcoming. The woman jerks, falls with a sick crunch on one of those pale hips in an effort to get away from you. You are hurt, and alarmed, and retreat further into the water. Your hand is still clawed as if to hold hers.

"Get back," she warns, voice raw and hoarse. Her eyes repeat their pattern. Close, open. Open and close. You close yours to see what she sees. Your eyelids are thin, translucent. The world can still be seen. She is right in front of you. "I'll hurt you. I'm a curse; I hurt everything.”

You open your eyes now, reach for her anyway. Your scaled hands catch hers, gentling them away from her hair. You smooth the strands, like your sister would do to you when the poachers came.

"My kind cannot be cursed," you tell her. This close she can feel the vibration, the way that your voice carries echoes of tidal pools and deep-sea trenches. "We are older than magic, older than pain. A different kind of creature."

She laughs, and it sounds like breaking glass. "Yeah? Well I bet you've never met anything like me before."

But you have. You've seen the way trauma can twist a soul, how it can make someone forget the shape of their own heart. You've watched your own kind waste away from grief and pollution, watched your bloodline dwindle to almost nothing. You recognize the look in her eyes—it's the same one you saw in your sister's before the toxic waste claimed her, before disease took your mother.

"Do not tell me what you think I know," you answer and she fidgets within your hold.

You are unsure of how to calm her, so you rummage deep inside of your long memory. You think of your mother. Now, you know. You pull her into the water with you, and she thrashes at first—all spinning limbs and desperate gasping. She is much like a fish at the end of a hook, you think. But you hold her, humming an ancient lullaby that vibrates through the water around you both.

Your singing voice, your Melody was always more unsightly than the others. So much higher and almost dissonant, like the cry of a whale during its migration. You mostly Sang alone, while others Sang together. But it winds around Jinx; maybe she is dissonant too. Slowly, so slowly, she stills.

"This is my body," you murmur, pressing close, your scales catching the ethereal light. "And this is yours." Your hands trace her tattoos like star maps, feeling the stories written in ink and scar tissue. You pause at her stomach, feeling an old grief there. You cast your Melody again, and it falls like a net over the skin underneath your fingers.

"You had a child," you say softly, and she goes rigid in your arms.

"Yes.” She admits this truth as if it hurts her. “She was not—not mine.”

“What was her name?”

“Isha,” she chokes out. “She was... I was supposed to protect her." 

“Mmm,” you say. “She was yours. I can feel it. She was yours, and you lost her.” 

You adjust your embrace, thumb at her bottom lip to reveal her blunt teeth. You have no understanding that this is not normal, that this touching and holding and avid tenderness is not of their culture. This woman, this bloodless weeping woman gazes at you. 

“Your motherhood,” you murmur, “sits inside you like a stone. It is closed, like an oyster. You must name it to begin to release the pain.” 

You press down on her lip. 

“What is your name?”

“Jinx,” she whispers.

“Good,” you tell her. “So, you are Jinx. Jinx, mother of Isha.”

The words seem to break something loose in her, and suddenly she's crying—great, heaving sobs that shake her whole body. You hold her through it, letting her tears mix with the mineral-rich water of your grotto. Strange woman, you think. She is a strange, sweet thing.

Her stomach tenses and releases, over and over. You never once stop your Song.

𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ ���

Days blur together after that. Time moves strangely here. The two of you are a jigsaw puzzle of connection, platonic or maybe familial. You do not ask, preferring to preserve what you have. 

Jinx is shy in the first few moments, a trait you suspect is unfamiliar to her. She builds herself a nest above the waterline: a chaos of stolen furniture and salvaged tech that somehow fits the space perfectly. You watch her work, fascinated by how her hands can create as easily as they dismantle. Sometimes she catches you staring and explains things to you—human concepts that make little sense but delight you anyway.

You measure progress not in days but in small victories: the first time Jinx falls asleep with her head in your lap, fingers curled trustingly around your scales. The morning she lets you rebraid her hair, your webbed fingers gentle against her scalp as you weave strands of luminescent crystal through the blue. The day she shows you how to make paper boats and sets them afloat with tiny lights inside, until the cavern ceiling reflects a mirror image of the stars she remembers from her brief childhood.

You offer up knowledge in return. You speak the thick language of old, born of trench sand and sulfur cracks. She loves when you sing, when your mouth unhinges to show your blue tongue and slightly jagged teeth. She wades into the grotto, standing in the shallow water that barely reaches her ankles, and closes her eyes. She sways as your Melody flows over her, shivering as if touched by cold.

You usually finish the performance by swimming to her, carefully holding her ankles between your extended claws and calling directly to her. This is your favorite—a secret you keep close. You adore how she gazes down at you, how her eyes trace the curve of your slick breasts and torso as you rise to meet her.

You climb until your noses brush, and then you laugh, a sound like the gentle puff of a flute. When you laugh, your gills seize and flex, and Jinx places a hand against them, tracing them until you crook your neck and trill. (That's her favorite.)

"[Name], you can't just walk around topless all the time," she tells you one day, trying not to laugh as you examine a shirt with obvious confusion. The fabric flutters strangely in her hands. "Humans are weird about bodies."

"But they're just bodies," you say, running a webbed hand over your scales. Again, her eyes follow. She closes her eyes, thinking of how your breasts are round and soft like the moon in her hand. You reach out, drawing her closer until she's touching you. "See? This is just flesh. The body is only a  house for our soul."

She grows quiet then, thoughtful in a way that makes her look younger. "Maybe that's why I'm so messed up. My house is... kind of a disaster zone."

You pull her close, letting your tail manifest and wrap around her legs. "Then we'll build you a new one. Piece by piece."

The trust comes in fragments, in stolen quiet moments. Some days she can't bear to be touched, and you give her space, watching from the depths as she paces and talks to ghosts you can't see. Other days she's almost peaceful, letting you massage her scalp or teaching you human games with cards that always seem to explode at exactly the wrong moment.

One night, the voices in her head were particularly loud. You hear it from beneath the water—you sleep closer to the surface since meeting her—and rise to find her jolting in her sleep. You don't think, only move, remembering to rid yourself of your tail only when it scrapes against a sheet of metal jutting from the sand.

You hum agitatedly, distressed by her furrowed brow and trembling body, then take her deeper into the grotto than she's ever been before. Here, crystal formations pulse with bioluminescence, casting rainbow shadows on walls that have never known sunlight. Schools of blind fish dart around you both, their scales glowing like fallen stars.

It takes her a while to wake, but you stay suspended and curled around her. You keep watch, eyeing the murky kelp forests that tease at your fins. There are other, older ways into this grotto that never bothered you before. But now, you're too aware of all the ways someone could reach the jinx resting in your arms.

You see bubbles snort from her nose as she begins to stir, and you move quickly to pluck a shell from the rainbow-dusted walls. The inside is sticky and suctions to her mouth, threading a tendril inside to loop around her lungs and better facilitate her breathing underwater. You don't understand why it works, but you've seen the surface swimmers use it before.

Jinx makes a horrible rasping noise before the shell's work settles in, and then breathing comes easier. The shell is now translucent and attenuated. She cups your side as she shifts in your hold, her unbraided hair thick around her face.

"This is beautiful," she whispers, and for once there's no edge to her voice, no great waiting catastrophe. You know she means you.

"Thank you," you respond, smiling with all your teeth. She smiles crookedly back.

"This was my mother's sanctuary," you tell her, leading her to a cave where ancient glyphs cover the walls. You see her back bend with the water's pressure, and you slow your pace. "There used to be many of me, my bloodline. But the surface world's poisons reached even here." You trace one of the symbols—a spiky, spherical rune that you think means 'confession'. This glyph is older than you, part of a complex language no surface dweller nor merfolk of this time has spoken in millennia. "Now there are only three of us left."

She's quiet for a long moment, her hand finding yours in the glowing water. "Does it ever get easier? Being the only one who survived?"

You think of your sister's last days, of your mother's fading voice. "No," you answer honestly. "But it becomes... different. The pain changes shape, becomes something you can carry without breaking."

She leans into you at that, and you feel the tremors that always precede one of her episodes. But this time, she doesn't fight it. She lets you hold her as the chaos revisits her, trusts you to keep her head above water—in a manner of speaking—as she shakes apart and slowly, slowly comes back together.

𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ 𓇼

It doesn’t simply disappear. Jinx is one of the spirits’ favorite souls to torture and possess.

Most nights, the past continues to crawl up through the cracked floors of the grotto like a cadaver, its saccharine breath seeping into Jinx's dreams until she wakes screaming. And on most of these nights, you find her in her nest of blankets and broken things, her skin fever-hot and her eyes seeing horrors you cannot share.

But after you take her down, beneath the surface, it is different. Now, most nights, she comes to you.

The pattern is the same: you hear her bare feet on the stone before you see her, padding toward the water's edge like a sleepwalker. Her hair is almost always loose, falling around her face in a cascade that reminds you of the sharp stretch of evening sky across the Arctic Ocean. Then she reaches the pool's edge, but she doesn’t stop.

The water accepts her like a lover, closing over her head in a gentle baptism. You rise to meet her, your form shifting in the dipping waves. You cup the nape of her neck and insert the shell. Your skin takes on its natural sheen, scattered with scales that catch the light like opals. Your hair moves as if still underwater even when you break the surface, glistening tendrils floating around your face. Your eyes are all pupil and hold the depths of the ocean, ancient and knowing, utterly without fear. You reach for her, and, like in the beginning, she still tries to pull away; you simply shake your head.

"Your curse cannot touch me," you remind her, your voice like water over stones. "I am not of your world." Your hands move to cup her face, thumbs brushing away tears that roll from the puffy cliff’s edge of her pale eyes. "I am of the deep places, the dark waters. We recognize our own, remember?"

Remember? You always ask her this. It’s all she ever does.

You rise fully from the water then, your form shifting like light through waves until you stand on human legs, naked and gleaming. You pull Jinx to her feet and begin to undress her with the innocent purpose of a child, unbound by human conventions of modesty or shame. She allows it, trembling—not from cold or fear, but from the overwhelming sensation of being touched without consequence, of being seen. She has yet to confess how much she needs this.

"This is my body," you murmur, pressing close, your scaled hands tracing the bridge of her spine. You are reminding her. "And this is yours. We are both such difficult creatures."

"I don't understand you," she whispers, but her hands come up to trace the patterns of your scales, mapping the places where your skin shifts from human to something else entirely.

You catch her hand and press it flat against your chest, letting her feel the strange rhythm of your heart—beating in time with the tides.

"Fear is for those who have something to lose. My kind has already lost almost everything. What's left is..." You pause, searching for words in a language not made for shadowy creatures like you. "What's left is precious because it survived. I am surviving. You are surviving with me.”

Something shifts in her expression then, understanding blooming like oil across the top of a gulf. Her fingers tangle in your hair, pulling you closer until your foreheads touch.

"Show me again," she breathes, begging. Her breath smells sweet, like candy under the tongue and behind the teeth. "Please."

You take her deeper into the grotto than before, past the engraved walls and into the true heart of your domain. Here, the water is almost desperately alive, swirling with colors that have no names in any human tongue. Your tail manifests fully, lashing out. You seem to be made of living jewels. You are a terrible, beautiful monster; your body twists like a snake as you duck and dive. Jinx watches, transfixed, as you dance through the water, showing her your true way of living.

You do what your kind does when in love. You Sing. You Pull her.

"I've been trying to fix my machines," she says when your last note fades. You are shaking. You have never Sung that hard before. Your Melody has undone you, and you swim weakly back to her. She touches your face, dusts your cheeks with her pruned fingertips. "To make lights that look like this." She gestures at the bioluminescent display around you. "But I keep fucking it up. Everything I touch turns to..."

"A mess," you finish for her. These thoughts are not new. "But a mess is not always born of destruction." You guide her hand through the water, watching the way the disturbed bioluminescence creates new patterns, new constellations. "Sometimes it's just change. It is new, without guidance. You are trying again, relearning. This is only necessary disorder."

She laughs, but it's softer than usual. "Is that what I am? Disordered?"

You pull her closer, letting your tail wrap around her legs as you float together in the heart of the sea. "You are what you choose to be. Here, in these waters, you don't have to be anything but yourself." You pull back so that you can see your hands as you sign to her, curl your fingers into the symbols she’s seen on the walls.

You have changed me. You mouth the words so that she truly understands. You sign it again, across her naked chest so that she can feel the drag of your claws and the pump of her blood in response.

"I don’t feel changed, and I don’t want to ruin you. What if I am still broken?" Her voice cracks on the last word.

"Then be broken here with me," you tell her, pressing your lips to her temple. "The water remembers everything, but it also cleanses. It changes. It heals."

She turns in your arms, and for once, her eyes are clear. No fever, no muddle—just Jinx, looking at you like she’s seeing you for the first time. Her hands find your face, thumbs tracing the almost invisible scales at your temples. You raise your hands, fingers contorting as you sign once more.

We have changed each other. It is a symptom of love.

Jinx says nothing, then she moves. You forget how agile she can be at times. With a few spritely movements, she is holding your waist and treading water. One hand comes up, cradling your face. There is a pause, and you glance at her, eyes wide with confusion and anticipation. This is new. She studies you, and you belatedly realize she is waiting for something. Permission, you think.

“Yes?” you ask. She smiles; it’s the right answer.

She slips out the shell, and you startle. This is dangerous, but she doesn’t care. She stops you.

Her hand nestles thoroughly in your hair, tilting your head until your flesh is exposed to her lips. Again and again, she presses her mouth to your neck. She suckles, nips, until your tail flicks. She is kissing you. You’ve never been kissed before—not like this.

Her teeth dig in, needling at the meat of your throat until it’s mottled and bruised. Then her lips come up to yours. At first, you breathe into her mouth to give her oxygen. Jinx pulls back, grips your jaw, and shakes you slightly. Then her lips return to yours, applying pressure until you open your mouth and allow her tongue in. She licks at your teeth, tracing the points as she holds you to her.

You feel lightheaded, disoriented. You feel good; you want more of her. After a long while, she breaks the contact. Her thumb settles at the base of your throat, slipping to the side to play with your gills. You trill sharply, and she laughs. You don’t want to say it, but you know—you want it to stay this way forever.

Jinx takes her shell from where she had placed it on her stomach. She allows it back into her throat, breathing in deeply. Then she lifts her hands and signs to you—clumsy but earnest.

Yes. You have changed me. It is a symptom of love.

𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ 𓇼

"I used to think I had to be loud," she tells you one night, floating on her back in the shallow parts of the grotto. Her hair fans out around her head like spilled ink, and you can't help but run your fingers through it, watching the way it parts around your hands. "Had to be crazy, had to be Jinx, because if I wasn't, then I'd have to be... her. The girl I was before. And she was weak. She got left behind."

You hum softly, the crystals below resonating in harmony. "Perhaps she wasn't weak," you suggest, tracing the constellation of freckles on her shoulder. "Perhaps she was just unfinished, like a pearl before the ocean completes its formation."

She turns to look at you then, the emotion in her eyes making your heart beat in that strange double rhythm that only happens when she's near.

"Is that what you're doing?" she asks. "Finishing me?"

You shake your head, pulling her closer until she's cradled against your chest, her back to your front, both of you suspended in the gentle current. "No one can complete you but yourself. I'm just... holding the space for you to do it.”

She's quiet for so long you think she might have fallen asleep. Then: "I’m in love with you." Her voice is barely a whisper, as if the words might shatter the peace.

Instead of answering, you press your lips to her shoulder, right where a new tattoo is healing—a pattern of waves and crystals mirroring your own scales. You helped her design it, watching in fascination as she used her clever hands to create the automaton.

"For us," you tell her, "it is different. We don't fall in love the way humans do. There's less emphasis on choices. It’s more like... finding a current that matches your own, something that pulls you in the same direction for the rest of your life. I've been swimming in your current since the day you arrived. There’s a vibration you release, deep inside me. You set it off, again and again."

Your mouth works oddly around the word "belly." She smiles at your struggle, turning in your embrace to press her forehead to yours in the way she knows you love. Her hands find your face, and you press a kiss to her fingers, grazing your teeth over her thumb. She shivers, captures your mouth briefly, then tucks herself back against you. Drowsy, she begins to dream and you let her, drifting your body lazily along the stretch of water to rock her.

It is then that you hear them—footsteps on stone, careful and measured. You recognize them instantly: the heavy tread of the enforcer, the lighter step of her companion. They've been searching for months, following rumors of blue hair seen in the Undercity's depths.

Jinx doesn't hear them, not yet. She’s drifting in that peaceful place between wakefulness and sleep, her body trustingly pliant in your embrace. She’d had an episode before this—memories of fire leaving her shaking for hours. But now she's quiet, her breathing synced with the gentle lap of water against stone.

You sense her presence before you see her, a disturbance in the air that makes the algae pulse brighter. The Sister. Her presence feels much like Jinx’s but more weathered, carrying the weight of blood. It catches in your throat unpleasantly, making you want to cough. Her footsteps falter at the grotto's entrance. The other one—Caitlyn, you recall—steadies her with a touch, but neither makes a sound.

They stand frozen at the sight before them: Jinx floating in the ethereal water, her hair unbound and threaded with living light, her face peaceful in a way they've never seen. Your tail curls protectively around her legs beneath the surface, scales catching and reflecting the cavern's natural light until it seems like you're both in some unreachable heaven. You bare your teeth to shatter the fantasy.

The Sister’s sharp intake of breath echoes off the stone. Jinx stirs slightly, but you soothe her with a soft hum, reworking her lullaby until the water itself vibrates in harmony. Her fingers tighten briefly on your arms before relaxing again.

When you meet the Sister’s eyes over Jinx's shoulder, you see tears tracking silently down her face. There's recognition there, and grief, and something like hope. You see the moment she understands what you are—not just a creature of the deep but a guardian. Her sister’s keeper; her sister’s mate.

Caitlyn moves forward as if to speak, but Violet—yes, Violet—stops her with a gentle touch. They watch as you shift slightly, letting them see how Jinx's newest tattoos mirror your own patterns—not random splashes of pain and memory but flowing lines that speak of partnership, of flesh and form meant to slot into one another.

A soft noise escapes Violet’s throat, something between a sob and a laugh. Jinx stirs again, and this time you let your gaze drop deliberately to her face, your webbed hands smoothing over her shoulders in a gesture that couldn't be more clear: She is safe here. She is loved here.

You raise a hand, your eyes slipping into their true state to make your threat clear. You know the Piltover girl will understand; her home is the home of poachers. Safe, you sign. Then, Go.

The Sister nods once, tears still falling. Her hand finds Caitlyn's and squeezes hard. You watch understanding pass between them—the recognition that sometimes healing happens in strange places, that sometimes love wears unfamiliar, frightening faces.

They turn to leave, but at the last moment, Violet looks back. Her lips form words you can read even across the distance: Thank you. Only when their footsteps fade completely do you press a kiss to Jinx's temple, tasting the salt of tears that aren’t your own.

"Are they gone?" Jinx's voice is quiet, still heavy with sleep.

"Yes," you answer honestly, because you've never lied to her and won’t start now.

She turns in your embrace, pressing her face into your neck where your scales fade into skin. "I'm not ready," she whispers. "Not yet."

"You can stay here," you promise, letting your tail wrap more securely around her. "For as long as you need. But you will not lose me. I will not lose you.”

She lifts her head to look at you, and her eyes are like silver dollars. You mimic her blinking for what must be the millionth time. Open, close. Close and open. She smiles at this. You smile, hollowing your throat to coo, mimicking the call of a bird of paradise. She laughs now; you are pleased.

 "Tell me again," she murmurs. "About your promise."

Your tail flicks as you nod.

“I will never leave; I will only follow,” you begin. The words are heavy, sacred mating rites belonging solely to your tribe. “The water flows across the earth; it is immovable. It is the human that will fade, not the earth, not myself. We will both replenish. Where you go, I will be there—past death and beyond.

Jinx rises, cupping your face firmly, her touch restricting your movement.

“Promise?” she asks, her voice dipping low, laced with danger.

“I promise.”

She presses her lips to your neck, her teeth sinking in as always. You let out a high, trembling sound, your control slipping. Suddenly, you’re human, treading water. Jinx hooks an arm beneath you, lifting you effortlessly as the water renders you weightless.

“I promise.”

You repeat it, over and over.

IpromiseIpromiseIpromiseIpromiseIpromiseIpromiseIpromiseI promiseI promise—

Jinx drags you from the grotto, positioning herself over you. Your words are still spilling out like a mantra.

“I know,” she murmurs.

Her warm, sugary lips cover yours, silencing you. She swallows you down.

© hcneymooners.

⚚ special taglist: @thatgrlnany @bubblestrbls @iluvwomensm @so-calledstr8 @the-record @blackdykegirlblogger @bugsinmypantsono @drgnflyteabox @montmorencys @rottngrl3 @vifilms @stupendousbananasharkcop @vminswrld @sevslefthand @fleshunger @soniiyi @sunhurtz @shootingc @diorblusher @nightlyconfusion @darkerstarsstuff @dollinin @16novvs @reign-azzz

[miniwheat77]

Loser. (Soap x Virgin!Reader.)

!NSFW, smut, p in v sex, unprotected sex, innocent reader, NO MINORS!

Unedited*

“You’d hit that? Even with how innocent Y/N is?”

“Ugh. Until her fuckin’ legs shake mate.” Soap laughs. Gaz rolls his eyes, laughing too. “You’re sick.”

“Nah, I think it’s an act.” Soap smirks. “No twenty-something year old is that naive.”

He doesn’t realize you’re listening on the other side of the door. They’d chose to have this conversation right outside the office you usually worked in. It was late and they didn’t figure you were still inside.

———

Later that night, you’re in the watch tower alone. It’s dark out, it’s pretty late. Soap is supposed to be up here with you, but you’re early. You’re curious about what he had said. What he meant by it anyways. Hit that? Until your legs shake? What does that even mean? You wanted to ask but also knew how wrong it had been of you to eavesdrop in the first place.

Soap walks through the door and startles you out of your daydream and you act as if you hadn’t heard his entire conversation earlier with Gaz. “Hey little lady.” He smiles. “Hi Johnny.” You smile back at him. Looking away quickly. He can tell that you’re acting off. “Everything alright?” He asks. “Uh.. yeah.” You mumble. He can tell you’re off. You knew that you should have listened to the others on base and stayed away from him. Sarah and Layla had told you on more than one occasion to stay away from him but had never actually explained why. You knew that the two could be a little overdramatic at times.

“I have a question actually.” Soap says, sliding a chair up to sit next to you. “Why do you wear your hair like that?” He asks.

“L-like what?” You brush it down. He makes you nervous, you aren't sure why.

“It’s always done up real nice. Sometimes you even got cute clips in it and stuff.” He toys with the ends that hang by your face, seeing the way your cheeks redden by his touch alone. You look down with a laugh. “Uh.. I’m not sure. I guess it’s just something I picked up on from my mo-“ you pause, shaking your head.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” He asks. “Uh.. it’s just… I guess I just don’t like to talk about my parents.” You mumble. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. But I’ll listen anytime you’d like.” He smiles, resting a hand on your knee. It doesn’t seem like it, but Johnny is being genuine. The other girls' words are always echoing around in your head. Johnny seemed nice and you needed to ignore what they said sometimes.

“They uh… they were very religious. So far beyond the normal extent that it was like a cult.” You look up at him. “No offense but is that kind’ve why you’re a little…”

“Sheltered?” You smile. “Well I wasn’t gonna say it.” He laughs.

“Yes it is. They didn’t let me have exposure to stuff like TV or books. Homeschooled all my life, expected to be well kempt and tidy. I guess some things just stuck. My room is spotless and my hair is always fixed.” You shrug. He smiles. “I like it though. Wouldn’t be you if it wasn’t I suppose.” He laughs.

“So. I know I shouldn’t have been listening, but I heard you talking to Gaz earlier.”

Soaps cheeks nearly light on fire.

“Uhhh. You weren’t supposed to hear it.” He laughs. “I’m sorry.”

“Well if you’re saying sorry it means it wasn’t good, what you were saying. I don’t know what that means.”

He furrows his brows in confusion. “Do uh… you not know what Sex is?”

Your eyes widen. “What? Y-yeah I know what it is. What does that have to do with this?” He sees the way you start to backtrack. How nervous you get talking about it. “I’d hit that” he laughs, repeating himself. In disbelief you have no idea what he meant when he said it. He looks down at the ground away from you. “It’s… a slang term. For sex.” He laughs. You look confused. “You’ve never heard it?” He asks. “No. I know what sex is but I’ve not mapped out the slang terms I guess. So what you were saying.” You swallow hard. Eyes finally moving up to meet his. You're starting to realize what he had meant. “You…” You’re very hesitant. “I would have sex with you, that’s what I meant.” He laughs. You try to play it off with a small laugh but he can see that you’re different now. “I’ve.. I’ve never um…” you rest your hand on the back of your chair. “I know. I can tell.”

He runs his tongue over his bottom lip. "I honestly thought that this was some kind of act you were putting up. Until you mentioned your parents. I feel like a dick now. I shouldn't have said what I said and I want you to know that what I was saying was really disrespectful of me. I shouldn't have been saying anything like that." He looks down at his hands, resting his elbows on his knees.

"What?" You ask. "I thought that wanting to have sex with someone is like a compliment or something." You mumble. "It is. Well. Kind of." He shakes his head with a laugh. "Look. It's awkward but I'll teach you all of the stupid slang terms alright? It doesn't make sense, you're supposed to grow up hearing this stuff and learn what it means along the way alright?" He laughs. You nod your head. "Okay. Yeah. Got it. " You blush. "Thank you Johnny." You mumble. "Course.” He laughs.

“You said something else too uh… until my legs shake? What does that mean?” Johnny’s face is on fire, embarrassed and blushing. How is he supposed to explain this away?

He sighs. “Well. This is what I get for being gross ah?” He laughs. “Sometimes during sex if it’s.. rough enough or good enough, your legs will shake. I guess. It’s more complex than that. You know.. Um... I'm gonna write down a website and I want you to look it up. Don't be scared alright? And don't watch it with anyone else around, it's bad."

"If it's bad why are you telling me to watch it?" You ask. "Because... It's about sex and you know how apprehensive you are about it. Everyone else is too. This website it's for adults only, watch it alone. You'll understand. If you see something you want to know about you can ask me or research it on like... an incognito browser on your phone. I'll show you how to do that too." He mumbles. He picks up a piece of printer paper and looks around until he finds a pen. He writes down the very familiar website and than shows you on your phone how to get to an incognito browser. Reminding you to never watch it with people around.

You have an idea of what he's telling you to look up.

Later that night when you’re off watch, you’re making sure your earbuds are connected to your phone before you look up the website he’s telling you about, the front page is intimidating enough before you even click on a video.

Hours later you’re still awake. The amount of terms you’ve learned about, the videos you’ve seen.

You feel corrupted.

Urban Dictionary and a Porn website have turned your entire life around. No wonder your parents kept you sheltered.

You finally fall asleep just a couple hours before you’re supposed to be awake. A new ache between your legs and you’re unsure how to fix it or make it feel better. The next day, you’re exhausted but everything you had learned the night before changed your perspective on everything. The conversations you had overheard from the men on base suddenly made so much sense. Why Layla and Sarah had told you to stay far away from Johnny made so much sense now.

“Uh.. Earth to Y/N. You alright?” Ghost waves his hand in your face and you jerk back away from him, swallowing hard. “Uh.. yeah. Sorry. Just didn’t sleep well.”

“Something keeping you awake love?” Ghost places his hand on your knee and Johnny watches across from the table as you go completely stiff, looking down at his hand. “Yeah.” You say it, “wait no. No I mean no. Sorry.” You shake your head, standing up fast. “Just slept in too late yesterday. I’ve got to go get some paperwork done.” You mumble. “See you guys around.” You wave, hurrying out of the mess hall and into your office. “What was that about?” Ghost laughs. "I think she's just stressed." Johnny laughs. He was getting a little nervous by your reaction. Maybe he had given you too much all at once.

———

You were desperate. You didn't care anymore. It had been almost two weeks since Johnny had showed you the website. He'd answered any questions you had, didn't matter how awkward.

You had so much pent up arousal. You were horny from days and days of watching nothing but videos. You wanted anything. You hurried up the watch tower stairs, heart thudding in your chest. You step inside, nerves growing as you such in a sharp breath. “Hey, everything okay?” He asks.

You swallow hard. “Yeah…”

“No not really.” You mumble. You take your seat like usual and face away from Johnny for a second. You don’t know how to ask him for help, you feel shameful. “What’s goin on? I do somn?” He asks. “Yeah. Yeah you did. You showed me what porn is and now I feel weird all of the time.” You huff. He laughs. “You don’t feel weird. You’re just horny.” You sigh. Tilting your head back and closing your eyes. “Yeah well. It sucks!” You groan. You feel tears pricking your eyes from your frustration. “What, touching yourself isn’t enough?” He laughs. “Touching myself?”

The thought of you doing that sounds foreign. “Oh dear… don’t tell me you’ve been watching 2 weeks worth of porn and haven’t made yourself cum.” He laughs. You stay quiet. “Poor girl, no wonder you’re so frustrated.” He laughs. You stand up, pacing back and forth slow. You’re trying to think to yourself. “I don’t really know how, no really. I’ve seen videos but they’re usually not helpful in the slightest.” Johnny glides his tongue over his bottom lip. Seeing you so frustrated has him a little riled up himself. “I.. not sure how much trust me.” He laughs.

You turn to look at him. Your pupils are blown wide.

“I could show you… if you wa-“

You nod your head before he even finishes his sentence. He leans forward in his chair, motioning you to come forward with his fingers. Your stomach fills with butterflies.

“Just uh.. take a deep breath, alright?” You nod your head. You’re still standing a ways away from him. He reaches out, pulling you forward by the back of your thigh, until you’re right directly in front of him. He looks up at you. “S’alright lass. Nothing to be nervous about.” He mumbles. You’ve sat next to Johnny sure, but this is different. You’re closer to him than you ever have been. He smells like cologne and hair pomade. You close your eyes as you he reaches for your cargo pants. You don’t make any movements to stop him. He continues. He unbuttons them, slow. He doesn’t want to startle you or move too fast. He wants to give you ample time to stop him. You have a choice, he wants to make that known. He tugs them down slightly, you close your eyes tight. Biting your lip. What you were about to trust him with was a lot. Further than you’ve ever gone with anyone else.

He grasps the waistband of your panties, pushing them down just far enough he could get a hand between them and your skin. He glides his hand between them.

Johnny glides the side of his pointer finger across your slit. Collecting your arousal on his finger. When he draws it away he can see just how wet you are. It drives him fucking crazy.

He parts his fingers, seeing strings of your arousal across them. His cock is rock hard in seconds, by far the most turned on he’s ever been in his life. He lets out a laugh. Shaking his head. “My god you are wet.” he shakes his head, biting his lip. He growls under his breath. He wants to devour you. Fuck you until your legs really shake, until you’re crying out for more. “You been watching more videos, Bonnie?” He asks. You nod your head. “See you’ve found one you like” he chuckles. You chew at your lip nervously. “Johnny..” you whine. “Hm?”

“I want to know what it feels like to cum..” you look down at him. “Please show me.” You whine.

“I’ll show you, doll. Just relax into me okay?” He breathes. “Cmere, why don’t you sit in my lap.” He pulls you forward. You spin around, sitting down on him. You can feel his erection pressing into you. He pushes your cargo pants and panties down further, until one of your legs is completely free. “Prop your leg up on me, don’t be shy.” He sighs. His warm breath is right against your ear. He pushes your hair behind your ear, he wants you to hear him. He’s going to talk you through it.

“Just watch my hand. Do as I say. I’ll show you how lass.” He breathes. You nod your head. Your face is hot, in such a daze you barely even know what’s going on around you. “I’m so horny Johnny.. I can’t take it.” You cry. Tears filling your eyes. “Just watch darling..” he trails his hand across your bare stomach, he’d pulled your shirt up. Pushing down, until his huge hand glides over your mound. Stopping just right at the top. He circles over your clit with two of his fingers, feeling you jump against him. “It’s going to be really sensitive. Since you’ve never touched here before, alright?” You nod your head. You’re panting. “It’s your clit. You try.” He moved his hand lower, drawing circles around your opening as you start to rub your clit. You’re getting more comfortable, relaxing into him. “That’s it. Just keep doing that for me, yeah.” He breathes. He raises his hand to his mouth. Using his saliva to wet down his fingers enough. Circling his spit over your hole. He’s prepping you.

“Deep breath.” He mumbles. You nod your head.

He doesn’t have to stretch you too much. He pushes his finger in, feeling you tense up. “Oh god.” You pant. Wiggling your hips lower into him. You pause your movement, whining out. “Keep rubbing your clit baby. I didn’t say to stop.” He breathes. His voice is low and sexy. He’s turned on. A side of Johnny you hadn’t seen.

He pairs another finger up, pushing it back into you. You gasp, clutching his wrist with your free hand. “There you go darling.” Your breaths get a little more rigid. Nearly panting out as he fingers you. “Keep going darling. Gentle, not too fast now.” He guides you.

“I- oh god!” You cry. “There you go baby. That’s it… give it to me.” He whines, raising his hips into you. You can tell he wants relief of his own.

You grasp his hand, forcing him away. “Woah- hey. Everything okay?” He asks. You stand on one leg. Turning so that you could straddle his lap. Sitting down on him again. “F-fuck..” he grits his teeth. “What’re you doing?”

“I want to know what it’s like.” You look him in the eyes. “Y/N.” He warns. He knows what it is you want.

“Johnny.” You repeat his name back. “Your virginity is really important. I think you’re just really turned on. Not thinking straig-“ he clenches his eyes shut as you rut your hips into his. He swallows hard. “You can’t take it back. Once you do it with me, I’ll always be your first.” He breathes. “I think you should really think about it.” He swallows hard. “I think I’ve got my mind made up, MacTavish.” You sigh, hands clutching at the collar of his shirt. You lean into him, lips brushing over his. You kiss him, hard. He can feel your heart thumping in your chest.

Johnny is in shock. Because this isn’t just another hook up and you’re not just another girl.

You’re Y/N. The girl who is supposed to be so far out of his reach, out of his league even. You’re not someone Johnny ever expected to be sitting in his lap, wanting more than just a kiss even. Wanting to…

He has to draw himself out of his trance. You want your first to be him. And Johnny up until this point is recognized as a scumbag. Everyone knows it. He’s desperate for any kind of attention he’ll get. He knows that this is how people feel about him. Maybe they don’t know him, don’t know that he wants to be loved. He wants it all, using any way he can to get it, even if it does make him look like an asshole.

Not anymore. Johnny wants your attention. Yours and yours only, he knows it.

“Okay.. look at me.” He pushes back. “If you want me to do this, we’re gonna do it right.” You nod your head. “We’ll go slow. I don’t want to hurt you. I want you to know that this is how you should be treated. Always. Okay?” You nod your head.

He unbuckles his belt, pushing his jeans down his thighs just enough. You swallow hard at the size of him, not sure what you were expecting. “Are you sure?” You nod your head. Looking at him. You prop yourself up and he helps you. Spitting in his hand and gliding it up his cock. If he had lube he’d use it. Knowing how bad this is about to hurt you. Once he’s got himself lined up with your entrance, you’re eager. Pushing yourself down onto him. He tries to force you to be gentle. You’re in a hurry. Desperate to have him inside of you.

Once you get to that point, where you start to stretch, you slow. Biting your lip. He can tell it’s starting to hurt.

“It’s okay- it’s alright lass. Deep breath for me.” Soaps face crunches up in pleasure, trying his best to conceal it because he doesn’t want to enjoy this when you’re not.

“Oh fuck…” he pants. His voice is so unsteady you can’t help but smile. “Are you okay Johnny?”

“Y-yeah. You just feel so fucking good.” He smiles, eyes closing. “Just a little more, you’re doing so good for me.” He pants. You hiss, and he hesitates. Drawing his hips back into the chair and raising you up slightly. He gathers more arousal at the tip of his cock. Spearing you further onto him. It’s easier to slide like this.

“I’m going to push all of the way alright? Deep breath.” He lowers you completely, burying his head into the crook of your neck. He takes in a sharp breath, standing up with you. It’s not the best place for it, but not the worst. He lays you right on the ground. It’s clean, you’d just cleaned it the night before.

The feeling of all of his body weight on you is intimidating. Something you’ve never felt before. He takes one deep thrust and you’re gasping out, a cry leaving your lips as he penetrates to the deepest parts of you. Just like that, it’s over.

You have your eyes screwed shut and he gives you a couple minutes to adjust before he starts fucking you. He’s slow, trying to ease the pain.

And it works. Your eyes soften as they slowly open, lips going from locked shut to parted. Your hands had a tight hold on his shirt and they’re staring to relax. You were dead quiet, but as he moves you start to pant.

You’re starting to like it.

Soap sighs, thank god.

He keeps a steady pace until he knows you can take more and then he’s rocking his hips into you deeper. “Oh god Johnny.” You mewl, opening your legs wider for him. Giving him complete access to you. His eyes widen.

Johnny has been with his fair share of women, each different from the last. You’re by far the most gentle, skin soft against his. Your clutches are even soft when you run your hands through his mow hawk and grip it. Your body is like a clouded temple and the fact that he’s been allowed inside is something Johnny is going to cherish, he’s never letting this go. He’s made up his mind.

He starts driving himself into you at a brutal pace. You’re trying your best to stay quiet but it’s hard. “Ah, Johnny. S’a lot.” You breathe. “Deep breathes, I said I’d make your legs shake and I intend on it darling.” He chuckles. You can’t help but blush.

He expected it to be easier, but you’re taking a lot. “Johnny I- I’m gonna cum!” You whine. Your legs start to shiver just slightly and he smiles. “Go on doll, show me how good I make you feel. Cum for me.” You screw your eyes shut, focusing on the knot building and how his cock stimulates the perfect place to make it unwind. He’s getting overwhelmed. This is the first time you’ll ever cum. Not just that. The first time you’ll ever cum, and it’s around his cock. Not from your fingers, or even his. Not a pillow you’re desperately rutting into. Around Johnny’s dick.

He lowers his hand, pressing his fingertips into your clit and your mouth parts in shock, how good he feels is unmatched. A cry barely leaves your lips and he covers your mouth with his hand. Fucking you into your high. When you hit it, your legs shake.

Just like in the videos.

You’re on the verge of crying when Johnny hits his high. He’s panting and whining and it’s almost pathetic as he reaches it. He doesn’t think to pull out.

———

“Y/N. He’s just using you. He wants to fuck you and then dump you. That’s who he is. He’s a loser.” Layla rolls her eyes.

Her words cut through you like a knife. “I.. why are you saying that?”

“Because it’s what guys like him do Y/N. He doesn’t want anything serious. He’d have a girlfriend if that were the case. I bet his body count would cripple you because he’s just a gross loser. He wants sex and no offense, but you’re naive and he knows if he shows up and shows out you’ll be dumb enough to give it to him. No offense.” She waves her hand. “I’m not trying to be a bitch but it’s true. I’m not saying to listen to me, I’m just warning you before you catch feelings and get your heart broken. You heard how he used to talk about you.”

You nod your head. “Thank you.” You mumble, turning away from her. The tears are hot as they spill over your eyelids the moment she can’t see your face anymore. You hurry away.

She was going to go find Johnny.

“I know you’re trying to get your claws into Y/N, but you need to stay away from her.”

She catches Johnny off guard, he’d just gotten off of watch with you. “What are you talking about?” He hurries to cover up the love bites he's got on his neck from you.

“I’m talking about how you’ve been spending so much time with her. I know you. You’re nothing but a loser looking for someone who will put out for you. That’s not her. So leave her alone.” He shakes his head. “You’ve got it wrong.”

“Do I? Because everyone here has heard the way you talk about her and other women.”

He shakes his head. “I don’t have anything to prove to you okay? I’m friends with Y/N and I care a lot about her whether you believe it or not." He's getting angry. "Whatever. I guess since she's so stupid and naïve we'll find out when you get her to fuck you." The words are laced with venom.

His face goes stone cold and he pauses, standing straight up and taking a step toward her. He's sharp with her.

"She's not stupid. Say whatever you want about me. Call me a loser, fine. But if you say that to me again we will have a much bigger problem on our hands." He's stern and his voice is quiet. "She's smart and she's had it rough. She's learning everything day by day. Naïve yes. Stupid? Absolutely not. Now back off." He growls. She is a little intimidated but she plays it off with a huff and leaves. His reaction to her calling you stupid had taken her completely off guard.

Maybe he really did have feelings for you.

———

"You know, one way to really find out if he likes her is to hit on him and see if he takes the bait." She shrugs. "Yeah, but I don't want to hurt Y/N by doing that." She sighs. "Layla, she'll get hurt even worse if she gives her V card up to that loser and he treats her like shit after." Her eyes are wide as she looks at her.

"I know Sarah. I guess you're right. Let's give it a go. But I already pissed him off so it's got to be you." She looks up from her tray of food. "Gross. Whatever." She scoffs.

The two wait until that night. Soap gets to the watch tower first and she takes the opportunity, heading up the stairs. Layla stays at the bottom of the stairs just in case.

She wants to stop you at the bottom and give Sarah enough time to do what she needs to do.

"Uh.. something wrong?" You ask. You startle her, she hadn't been paying attention. "Shit! You scared me. No- no nothing is wrong. I just really needed to ask you a question and it couldn't wait." Her response is fast and it has you narrowing your eyes. "What is it?"

"It's... uhh." She pauses, trying to come up with something on the fly. "Look.. about you and Soap..."

"Jesus Layla, I've already starting retracting from him, I really just want this all behind us." You groan, pushing passed her. "Wait!" She grasps your hand. "What is going on? Why are you stalling to keep me down here?" You tear your arm out of her grasp and move further up the stairs but she's hot on your tail. "She's testing him!"

You pause right outside the door. "What?"

"She's going to hit on him to see if he'd cave. Y/N we don't want you to get hurt by him.” She says. "Jesus Christ." You reach for the handle but pause when you hear Soap.

"Sarah, I'm not interested okay? I've told you like 3 times now. I... I like Y/N. And I'm sure she wouldn't like knowing that you're doing this. Because I respect her enough, the moment she comes through those doors I'll tell her." He takes a step back.

You and Layla can hear it on the other side of the door but she tries to stop you as you reach for the door again.

"Oh come on John. You'd be stupid to pass this up." Her voice is low and she's trying to sound sexy. They hear shuffling inside. "You need to leave me alone. I... I love Y/N. You and Layla can believe it or not but I do and I'm done with whatever this is. Back off before I make you."

You shove the door open. "That's enough!" You yell.

Soap and Sarah jump. "What the fuck is the deal?"

"Did you put them up to this?" He asks. "Of course I didn't put them up to this, I'm not fucking crazy." The swears leaving your lips have everyone in the room startled. "I don't know what the obsession is with you two trying to protect me from Soap when it's none of your business!"

"We just don't want you to give your V card to him because he's a fucking loser Y/N!" Layla calls back.

"I already had sex with him!"

The rooms falls quiet.

Their eyes are wide and even Soap is completely baffled. "I already gave him my virginity. I already slept with him, we've had sex multiple times." You have your arms crossed. Scolding them like a mother scolds her kids. "Seriously? Why didn't you lead with that?" Sarah hisses. "Because you both have been acting crazy."

"You.. you love her? You had sex with her and you still like her..?" Layla and Sarah turn to Soap. He looks away. "Yeah. I do. Maybe if you both had given it a chance you would've seen it." He sighs. "I just threw myself at him and he didn't take the bait. I think that's enough for me." Sarah shrugs her shoulders.

"Give us some space please." You sigh.

"Okay.. We owe you a huge apology Y/N. We had no idea." Layla mumbles. "It's fine, we'll talk later." You sigh. They both leave, the moment the door is closed you're locking it behind them. "Those two, my god." You laugh. He starts laughing too. "Yeah, a bit protective." He chuckles. "I'm sorry about that." You roll your eyes.

"It's alright. They're just looking out for you. Hitting on me though, that's a bit crazy."

"Very crazy."

The both of you start laughing, unable to contain it.

"Cat's out of the bag now I guess."

"Yeah, yeah I guess it is." You look up at him. He's beginning to close the distance between the both of you. "You ready to make this official yet or what?" He smirks. "I don't think that that's the way to properly ask a girl out MacTavish."

"I also don't think it was very respectable of you to let me hit it before at least becoming my girlfriend either, Y/L/N." He raises a brow. "Fuck you." You roll your eyes. Playful smile on your lips. "I'll never get used to you cursing like that. It's kind of sexy actually." He leans in, lips right by yours. "Shut up and ask the question Johnny."

"Fine." He laughs.

"Y/N. Will you be my girlfriend? Officially."

"Yes." You laugh. "Thank god." He mumbles, wrapping his arms under your thighs and lifting you up. You wrap your legs around his waist. He pushes you into the wall behind you, you can feel that he's already hard as he presses into you.

"Been waiting weeks to finally hear that lass."

[dpspcehntr]

Letting my freak flag fly 🎏 imagine Zayne dressed in a posh tuxedo at an even posher dinner event celebrating some award he's won and you keep feeling him up under the table cloth. He snaps and tells you to meet him in the bathroom, thinking he's going to make you pay for all your teasing, but no lol you tell him you want him to manually pleasure you with his posh gloves on 😁 and then he has to keep wearing them until the event ends lol

My Brian when I'm bored, I swear....

My dear friend, I am always in your debt for how wonderful your mind is. Thank you for blessing me with such an image 🙇🏾🙇🏾🙇🏾

My ask box is officially back open! Send in your requests, thoughts, and head cannons and I might write a little something for you! Please read the rules first!

Warnings: public sex, fingering, gloves kink, exhibitionism (if you squint)

You place your hand in between his thighs, inching closer and closer to his crotch. He lets out a cough to disguise his groan as you begin to run your fingers along his clothed hard on forming. His breath is shallow as you trace a star along his crotch. You thanked the powers at be for how long the table cloth was. He leans over to your ear and covers his mouth.

“Behave yourself.”

You bite back a groan as he shifts to move your hand lower. He pulls back and rejoins the conversation at the table. You lean over to his ear and cover your mouth.

“Make me.”

His eyes flash with something but he’s is usual composed self before you can pin point it.

“Will you excuse us a moment?”

He stands up from the table and you follow suit. He offers you his arm and you link yours with his. You both walk calmly out the ballroom toward the restrooms. Once inside he gives you a once over.

“I usually would try to teach you some manners about these situations. But seeing as you’re dressed like this I don’t think I’m in my right mind enough to do so.”

You gulp watching his hand reach toward your dripping core. He hikes up your dress and presses himself into you.

“Keep the gloves on.”

“As you wish.”

He runs a finger over your clothed core a you bite back a moan.

“I’m suspecting you want me to accept my reward with you still on my fingers is that correct?”

You nod feverishly as he hooks a finger underneath your underwear. He presses two fingers into your dripping hole and thrust them in. The added texture of the gloves makes the stretch feel heavenly. You knew better than to thrust yourself onto them so with all your willpower you hold yourself still. His pace is merciless, fucking into you hard and fast. You grip his shoulders for support as you pull him in your a hot kiss. You weren’t gonna last much longer as a groan slips past your lips. He kisses down your jaw and neck as he pumps faster into you.

“Either you cum now or you wait till after the banquet. The choice is yours.”

He pumps into you once more as you clench down onto his fingers. You bite back the moan as you shake underneath him. He pulls his fingers out and pulls back from you. You both quickly fix yourselves up and head out the restroom one at a time. Once back at the table you examine your handiwork, the glove is still damp, your wetness clinging the gloves to his fingers. Soon he goes up to the stage and accepts himself award with the hand still smeared with your juices. You feel a gush in your already ruined underwear as he gives a quick speech. You can’t focus as you watch those two fingers grip the award, your head swimming with desire. When he arrives back at the table he holds his other hand out to you.

“My date is not feeling well this evening. I think it is best if I take her home now.”

He explains to the table as you gather yourself and take his hand. You already know what’s in store for you when you leave, the excitement leaving you dripping once again.

[lvnleah]

https://www.tumblr.com/lvnleah/771226075282997248/anyone-got-any-requests-for-steph-i-really-want?source=share

Of course! Meeting her after she broke up with her boyfriend, when she thought she doesn't want a relationship again, going to parties, until she met yn in one of those parties, (yn maybe can be a cousin from one of her teammates or not) so after they spent the night together, she tried to know who yn is, and the team is like playing detectives, only knowing Yn's name, so it's like going to Instagram, searching for her, and if you write to yn be someone teammates's cousin, that person can be like after an hour, I have a cousin with that name, so when she show her a picture, they laugh about it and of course, Steph started to follow her on Instagram.

new years twist | steph catley.

thank you for this request! :)

Steph didn’t think she wanted to go out that night. A New Year’s Eve party seemed like the last thing she needed, fresh off a breakup that had left her drained. But her teammates had insisted.

“Come on, Steph. You deserve a night to let loose,” Beth had said, practically dragging her out of her flat. “You can’t just sit in your flat, Steph. It’s New Year’s Eve. Start the year fresh.”

Steph had grumbled and muttered something about being too tired, but here she was. She nursed a drink and hovered near her teammates, pretending to be engaged in the conversation while her eyes wandered around the room.

That’s when she saw you.

You were at the bar, leaning casually against the counter, your laughter ringing out above the hum of the room. Your confidence drew her in like a magnet. She didn’t know you, but she wanted to.

“Who’s that?” Steph found herself asking Beth, who was standing beside her.

Beth followed Steph’s gaze. “No idea, but she’s cute. You should talk to her.”

Steph scoffed. “I don’t even know her.”

Beth grinned, nudging Steph’s arm. “Exactly. Go fix that.”

Steph hesitated for a moment before draining the rest of her drink. “Fine,” she muttered, heading toward the bar.

As she approached, you turned to look at her, your eyes meeting hers with an ease that made her stomach flip. “Hi,” Steph said, a little unsure of herself.

“Hi,” you replied, your lips curving into a smile. “You look like you’d rather be anywhere but here.”

Steph laughed, a little surprised at your observation. “You’re not wrong. My friends dragged me out.”

“Well, I’m glad they did. I’m Y/N,” you said.

“Steph,” she replied, shaking your hand. It was warm, and she found herself reluctant to let go. “So how come you’re here?”

“Oh, I'm with my cousin!” You smiled, “Her friends have arrived so she’s gone to see them.”

The conversation flowed naturally after that. She learned that you were visiting from out of town, and staying with family for the holidays. You told her about your job, your interests, your love for sarcastic banter—which you demonstrated by teasing Steph every chance you got. And Steph, to her surprise, loved it.

Hours passed in what felt like minutes. The countdown to midnight crept closer, and Steph didn’t want the night to end. She was caught up in your laughter, in the way your eyes sparkled when you told a story, in the way you leaned closer to her as the night went on.

“Ten seconds!” someone shouted, and the room erupted in cheers, everyone counting down together.

Steph turned to look at you. You were already looking at her, a small, knowing smile on your lips. “So, are we doing this or what?” you asked, your voice teasing but your eyes soft.

Steph didn’t hesitate. When the room shouted, “One! Happy New Year!” she leaned in, her lips capturing yours in a kiss that stole her breath. The world around her disappeared. It was just you, your hands resting on her waist, your lips moving against hers like you’d done this a hundred times before.

When you finally pulled away, Steph was speechless. You laughed softly, brushing a strand of hair from her face. “Happy New Year, Steph.”

She smiled, her heart pounding. “Happy New Year.”

Later, you both found yourselves back at Steph’s apartment. Once inside, the two of you didn’t waste any time. Kisses turned heated, hands exploring everywhere, laughter morphing into gasps and strings of moans. Steph didn’t remember the last time she felt this alive.

When she woke up the next morning, the sun streaming through the curtains, her first instinct was to reach for you. But the other side of the bed was empty. Your scent lingered on the pillow, but you were gone.

Her heart sank. She sat up, running a hand through her hair, replaying the night in her mind. Had she misread things? She shook her head, chastising herself. It was one night. Maybe that’s all it was supposed to be.

Training resumed a few days later, but Steph couldn’t stop thinking about you. She mentioned it casually to Caitlin as they stretched before practice.

“She just… left,” Steph said, frustration creeping into her voice. “I didn’t even get her number.”

Caitlin raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t ask for it?”

“I didn’t think I needed to!” Steph groaned. “I thought we’d at least talk in the morning.”

Caitlin smirked. “Well, what’s her name? Maybe we can find her.”

That caught Beth’s attention. “Wait, wait, wait. We’re finding someone? Who?”

Steph sighed, realizing she’d just made things worse. “Her name’s Y/N. That’s all I’ve got.”

Beth’s eyes lit up. “Oh, this is going to be fun. Give me ten minutes.”

What followed was the most chaotic, ridiculous investigation Steph had ever witnessed. Beth, Caitlin, and a few others scoured Instagram, typing in your name and cross-referencing profiles.

Occasionally, they’d show Steph a photo. “Is this her?” Beth would ask, holding up her phone.

“No,” Steph said for the fifth time, her patience wearing thin.

“Maybe she doesn’t have Instagram,” Caitlin suggested.

“Everyone has Instagram,” Beth countered. “We just haven’t found her yet.”

The commotion attracted Leah. “What’s going on here?”

“We’re trying to find Steph’s mystery girl,” Beth said, grinning.

Leah raised an eyebrow. “Mystery girl?”

Steph sighed. “It’s nothing. Just someone I met at the New Year’s party.”

Leah frowned, then seemed to freeze. “Wait. What’s her name?”

Steph told her, and Leah’s jaw dropped. “You’re kidding.”

“What?” Steph asked, confused.

Leah started laughing, pulling out her phone. “That’s my cousin’s name and she was with me at that party.”

The entire room erupted into laughter. “No way!” Beth said.

Leah scrolled through her phone and pulled up a photo. “This her?”

Steph’s face turned bright red. “Yeah, that’s her.”

Leah shook her head, still laughing. “I can’t believe this. You kissed my cousin?”

“It was a good kiss,” Steph muttered, which only made everyone laugh harder. “And night…”

Leah took Steph's phone before she handed it back. “Here. Just follow her on Instagram. I’ll text her and let her know to check.”

Steph hesitated for a moment before hitting the follow button. Within minutes, you followed her back, and Steph’s phone buzzed with a message.

“Small world, huh?” you wrote, followed by a winking emoji.

Steph smiled down at her phone, her heart racing. Maybe it had started as one night, but something told her it was just the beginning.

[corruptedcaps]

Travel Size: Alex

This is a sequel to my last story, Travel Size. Enjoy!

--

Alex waited impatiently for the bus while refreshing the social media feeds on her phone.

"Thank god, they're still partying." Alex said to herself as she watched a newly posted video on Becky's Instagram. In the video Becky, Cassie and Bianca were all dancing in a club surrounded by hot guys. A part of Alex was jealous but a stronger part of her was thankful that the newly made bitches were keeping themselves distracted.

It had only been a few hours since Alex had witnessed her best friends be turned into evil reflections of themselves. She couldn’t shake the horrifying images of Becky, Bianca, and Cassie transforming into arrogant, wicked versions of themselves.

That was why Alex was waiting on a bus. She needed to get back to college and more specifically she needed to get to Amber's sorority and find whatever regular sized vibrator she had and destroy it. If the travel size could create bitches like Becky and her friends, she shudder to think what a full sized one could unleash.

She didn’t even know if Amber owned a larger one or where she would keep it but she knew once it dawned on Becky that one could exist, then she would stop at nothing to get it. Alex had to destroy it.

After giving up on the bus, Alex hitchhiked most of the way back to their college town and finally arrived at Amber’s sorority house just after 5pm. It was an imposing, over-the-top building, complete with pristine landscaping and a giant Greek-lettered sign on the front but it was also empty thanks to the out of state cheerleading finals. Alex’s heart hammered as she climbed the steps to the door.

As she went to grab the handle of the door it suddenly swung open to reveal the tall, chiseled frame of a guy with sharp green eyes and attractively messy brown hair. Alex knew him as Amber’s trust fund boyfriend Max. His gaze swept over Alex, skeptical and faintly amused.

“Who are you?” He asked, his voice smooth and confident.

Alex stammered, trying to think of a plausible excuse. “Uh… hi, I’m one of your girlfriend’s friends. I, um, left something in her room the last time I was here.”

He smirked faintly. “You’re one of Becky’s friends?” He didn’t even try to hide his disbelief.

Alex panicked, it was worse than she thought. The vibrator had somehow warped reality so Amber wasn’t the top bitch on campus, Becky was. Alex figured she was spared from the memory of this new reality because she was present during its formation. But, she thought, this new world could work in her advantage.

“Okay, okay. The truth is… Becky’s not exactly my friend, not anymore. We used to be friends but then she decided I was better off being her victim. She makes me do her homework. And on the last assignment, I forgot to take my name off it. If she finds out, I’m dead.”

His smirk grew. “So, she’s your bully?”

Alex nodded earnestly, leaning into her pitiful act. “Yeah. Please, I just need to fix it before she gets back. I swear, I’ll be quick.”

He studied her for a long moment, then sighed, stepping aside. “Fine. But make it fast. Becky will kill me if she finds out I let you in.”

Alex rushed past him, her heart pounding. The sorority house was even more intimidating on the inside, filled with pristine furniture, expensive décor, and an air of unearned superiority. She climbed the grand staircase, the sound of her sneakers echoing against the marble floors, and found Becky’s room at the end of the hall.

It was just as she’d imagined, pink and white with designer everything. The bed was piled high with silk pillows, and the vanity sparkled with countless beauty products. Pictures showing Becky, Cassie and Bianca adorned the walls. Alex moved quickly to the nightstand, opening the drawer and rummaging through it until her fingers brushed against something cold and smooth.

She pulled it out and froze. There it was. Amber’s, now Becky’s, full-sized pink vibrator. It was twice the size of the one Becky had used, and its shiny surface gleamed ominously in the dim light. The words ‘Mega-Bitch’ embossed on its surface. Alex didn’t know why, but she knew if she destroyed it everything would go back to normal.

She picked it up carefully, her hands trembling. It looked so absurdly normal, for a vibrator, and yet it radiated an eerie power she could almost feel. She turned it over, inspecting it as if expecting it to spring to life.

“Okay, Alex.” She whispered to herself. “Just snap it in half. Do it. Right now.”

But as she tightened her grip, her eyes caught her reflection in the massive mirror over Becky’s dresser.

She froze. The mirror reflected every insecurity she had tried to ignore. Her plain, unremarkable features, her frizzy hair, her uneven skin, her awkward posture. She looked every bit the nobody she felt she was, standing in the middle of a room that belonged to someone who had everything.

Her breath hitched. The vibrator seemed to hum faintly in her hands, almost as if it were alive, urging her to act.

“Just one time.” A small, insidious voice whispered in the back of her mind. “What’s the harm? You deserve to be beautiful too, don’t you? Confident. Powerful. Somebody.”

Alex’s fingers hovered over the power button, trembling. She squeezed her eyes shut, shaking her head. She thought of Amber and her bitchy friends, she thought of her own corrupted friends, Becky, Cassie and Bianca. “No, I’m not like them.”

But when she opened her eyes again, the reflection in the mirror seemed to mock her, daring her to prove herself wrong. It looked like her, but the face twisted into a cruel smirk, the kind she’d seen on Amber’s face countless times.

“That’s right.” Her reflection sneered, its voice dripping with malice. “You’re not like them. They’re perfect, beautiful, untouchable. And you?” It laughed, the sound sharp and cutting. “You’re plain. Boring. Ugly. A nobody.”

Alex’s chest tightened as she tried to look away, but her reflection leaned closer, impossibly close, as though it were pressing through the glass.

“You’ll never be anything more than this. They’ll always walk all over you. Always look down on you. Unless…” It hissed

Alex’s breath hitched. “Unless what?”

The reflection’s smirk widened. “Unless you stop pretending you don’t want it. You felt it, didn’t you? The power in your hands. You could be more. No, you could be better. You could be everything. But you’ll never have the guts.”

Alex’s fingers hovered over the power button. “I… I can’t.”

“Of course you can’t. You’re weak. Always have been. Always will be. You don’t have what it takes to be one of them. You’ll always be nothing.” The reflection said, mocking.

Something inside Alex snapped. With a surge of anger, she pressed the button, and the vibrator whirred to life in her hands. The power of the vibration was so strong that her eyes instantly rolled back in her head and her clothes exploded from her body leaving her bare naked. It was a more powerful sensation than Becky had experienced, one designed to instantly enthrall and it worked as her lips curled into a smirk. She was a woman possessed.

Laying down on Becky’s plush bed, Alex lowered the vibrator in between her legs, the vibrator's hum filling her ears as she pressed it against her eager pussy. "Yessss!" She moaned, the sensation overwhelming, igniting a fire within her.

As she continued, her transformation began. Her hair turned from a mousy brown to a mouth-watering platinum blonde cascade, thick and shiny, framing her face in a way that screamed 'hot'. Her lips swelled, becoming juicy and inviting, perfect for both seduction and sneers. Her nails lengthened, sharp and glossy, adding to her newfound, bratty look.

"Fuck, yesssss!" She groaned, her breasts expanding, becoming fuller, rounder, making her silhouette undeniably sexy. The change in her body was not just physical, it was as if each vibration was sculpting her into something more... bitchy, more dominant.

"Yes, make me into an evil bitch! Make me into THE evil bitch!" She hissed, her voice filled with a provocative edge. Her skin seemed to glow, becoming flawless and tempting, the kind of beauty that could make anyone falter.

Her moans grew louder, more demanding, as if each sound was peeling away layers of her former self. "Fuck, yesssss, Becky and Amber are fucking nothing compared to what I’ll be!" She yelled, her body writhing in ecstasy, the pleasure morphing her into someone unrecognizable. Her curves became more pronounced, her posture more confident, her entire being radiating an aura of superiority.

As her orgasm crashed over her, it was like the final seal on her new identity. Her good nature was gone, replaced by a cold disdain, her vanity now immense, her once gentle soul now filled with a bratty, bitchy darkness.

All the pictures in the room changed to images of her. No friends, just her. All she needed was herself.

"Pathetic." She sneered at the thought of her old self, her new voice dripping with scorn. "I was such a waste before. Now, everyone will see, everyone will know... I am the queen."

Sitting up, her reflection was no longer mocking her. It was her, and it grinned back at her with the same ferocity she felt inside. Alex was no more. In her place was a vision of sexy, unapologetic power, ready to cast her shadow over the campus, leaving a trail of awe and submission in her wake. She was Lexi now.

After her transformation, Alex walked over to her new closet with graceful and assured strides. She took pleasure in imagining herself in each of the expensive and revealing outfits but eventually she selected items that would showcase her new, sexy persona.

First, she slipped into a white lace bra that cradled her now fuller, more voluptuous breasts, the delicate material contrasting sharply with her transformed body. The bra seemed almost too small, hugging her curves in a way that was both provocative and flattering.

Next, she pulled on a short black skirt, the hemline daringly high, revealing her shapely legs. The fabric clung to her hips, accentuating her figure in a way that screamed for attention. Her hands then glided over her legs as she donned shear lace black tights, their intricate pattern adding a layer of mystery and danger to her ensemble.

She sat back on the bed, snapping pictures of herself, admiring her reflection. The outfit transformed her into the epitome of seductive power, her previous nerdy self now just a distant memory.

"Look at me, I'm perfect." She whispered to her reflection, her voice a mix of pride and the new, bratty confidence.

Max had heard the moans and, concerned, decided to check on Alex. What he found was not the nerdy girl he had let in but a transformed vision, a beautiful goddess.

For a second his mind was awash with confusion until reality settled in his mind and new memories solidified. Lexi was the baddest bitch on campus, a beautiful terror who dripped of bratty arrogance and she was all his.

He still remembered when he brought her to meet his rich parents and how quickly they took to her but he remembered that night more for Lexi’s ability to give him a handjob under the dinner table without his parents realizing.

"What some company?" Max asked, his voice smooth and confident.

Lexi looked at him, her eyes drinking him in. Her new body ached to be touched and worshipped by another. He would do. Without a word, she curled her finger, beckoning him closer with a smirk that promised both danger and pleasure.

As Max stood before her, she reached up, pulling him into a deep, passionate kiss. Their lips met with an intensity that spoke of desire and conquest. Lexi's hands roamed over Max's body, pulling him onto the bed with her.

"Fuck me like you've never fucked anyone." Lexi whispered into his ear, her voice a sultry command.

Max, overwhelmed by the raw sexuality she exuded, didn't need any encouragement. His hands explored her newly curvaceous form as she undid his pants. Lexi moaned, her voice now a mix of pleasure and triumph as she felt his big cock slide into her, his thrusts deep and rhythmic.

Their bodies moved in sync, each movement more desperate than the last. Lexi wrapped her legs around him, pulling him deeper, her nails digging into his back as she arched into him, meeting his every thrust with equal fervor. The room filled with the sounds of their passion, her moans mixing with his grunts, the bed creaking under their intensity.

Lexi felt powerful, each movement a step towards taking what she wanted. She looked into Max's eyes, her own filled with a victorious gleam. "Harder you big dick bastard!" She urged, her voice dripping with a mix of need and command. Max, lost in the moment, obeyed, driving into her with a force that made her scream in ecstasy.

As Max felt the familiar tension building towards climax, Lexi, with a mischievous glint in her eye, suddenly reoriented their positions, pushing his back onto the bed so she could mount him. Her pussy expertly gripping his cock, holding his orgasm at bay. He groaned, the pleasure almost too much to bear, yet there he was, teetering on the edge without release.

"What are you doing?" Max managed to ask, his voice strained with need.

Lexi leaned close, her breath hot against his ear. "I'll let you cum, if you let me stick this up your ass as you do." She said with a grin as she produced the big vibrator.

Max shook his head, trying to resist the overwhelming sensation. "No way! If the guys find out I’ll never hear it down." He gasped out, though his body betrayed his words, craving the release.

With a grin that was both seductive and cruel, Lexi began to lift herself off him. "Okay, then, suit yourself." She said, her tone teasing, starting to dismount.

But Max couldn't let her go. The need to cum was too intense, his body overriding his fear of reprisal. With a desperate move, he pulled her back down onto him. "Fine! Do whatever you want!" He pleaded, his resolve crumbling under the pressure of his unfulfilled desire.

Lexi's grin widened, enjoying the power she wielded over him. She leaned in, her lips brushing against his as she whispered, "Good boy. You’ll love it, I swear."

She inserted the vibrator into his butt while his cock was still deep inside her. She didn't turn it on immediately, instead, she began to move her hips in slow, teasing circles, keeping him on the edge, prolonging his torment for her own amusement.

"Please!" Max begged, his hands gripping her hips, trying to guide her movements.

“Please what?” Lexi said enjoying watching him squirm.

“Please… turn it on.” He groaned, desperate for sweet release.

With an evil grin she switched it on and Max began to shudder with ecstasy as but then felt an immediate, strange sensation. As the vibrations coursed through him, his body began to change. His features softened, his skin became smoother, his hair lengthened and darkened into a rich, flowing mane. His muscles reshaped, and his frame became more slender, more feminine.

“W-what the hell is happening to me?” Max whine, his voice going up several octaves. Lexi simply smirked as she felt his cock shrink inside her, gradually disappearing until it was replaced by a slick, new pussy.

The transformation was surreal for Lexi but weirdly erotic as well but what happened next pumped the erotism into high gear. The vibrator, now buzzing without her hand on it, suddenly grew pink bands that wrapped themselves around her waist, turning into an impressive strap-on.

"Mmmm now, let's see how you like it." Lexi said with a smirk, beginning to thrust with the new strap-on. Max, now Maxine, felt waves of pleasure unlike anything she had known before, her body responding in ways she never could have imagined.

"Please, Lexi!" Maxine moaned, her voice now higher, more feminine, filled with both confusion and ecstasy.

Lexi continued, her movements deliberate, claiming her new conquest. "You're mine now bitch, in every way! I’m your queen." She whispered, her voice dripping with dominance and satisfaction as she watched Maxine's transformation continue under her influence.

However the strap-on itself started to evolve even more. The base started to grow backwards towards Lexi, creating a long thick shaft that slithered into her pussy. Lexi’s eyes rolled back in pleasure and she felt a euphoria like nothing she had felt before. The vibrator seemed to speak to her, giving itself to her. It recognized her as a true wicked bitch for her act of transforming Max and opened her mind to its power and its secrets.

Lexi came again but this time it was as much a mental release as a physical one. She could see the way the vibrator could warp reality, how it could twist people it corrupted and she now had control over it. She would make Maxine’s new reality whatever she wanted.

The pleasure built, and with a final, deep thrust, Maxine reached her orgasm, her new body shuddering in delight, her new persona erasing Max entirely from her own mind and from reality.

In this reality, Maxine was Lexi’s cum slave, who lived to please her mistress and do everything that she commanded. She was her devoted little pet. Lexi would send Maxine to prowl the campus for hot guys and round them up for parties. Maxine was an expert at finding the hottest, richest guys that would vie for Lexi's attention.

However, Lexi had a new group in mind to round up for her now.

“Maxine, I have a special job for you. I need you to bring me Amber, Becky, Cassie and Bianca one by one to my room when they come back from their trip. Do you understand?” Lexi said as she pulled out of Maxine making the girl groan.

“Y-yes mistress. But why those four? They are just common sisters of the sorority.” Maxine asked.

Lexi stood up from the bed and walked once again to the closet. Her outfit had been ruined by the energetic fucking and she needed a change. Once opened she spotted a shiny reflective dress that would be perfect for the rest of the evening, no matter how 'energetic' she would become.

After doing a few twirls, approving all her angles, she strode over to Maxine with the vibrator in hand. As she walked in her 6 inches heels the straps flowed back into it and disappeared as if they had never been there. Although Lexi knew she could make them appear if she wanted. She felt a symbiotic link to the device now that Amber never had.

“Take this and use it on yourself.” Lexi grinned holding out the vibrator.

Maxine looked at the vibrator with reverence and even desire but she couldn’t bring herself to even stretch her arm out.

“N-no mistress. I couldn’t.” Maxine said dropping her head. Lexi smirked and put the vibrator into her side drawer.

“That’s why I want those girls specifically brought to me. They need to… reconditioned. But don’t worry, you’ll still be my number one slave.” Lexi said as she tilted Maxine’s chin up.

“Now go, they won’t be back for at least a day and I have some planning to do.” Lexi said her brief moment of warmth turning icy cold again.

Maxine rose from the bed and left the room quickly. Lexi loved the power she now had over her and couldn’t wait to break in the other girls.

She looked at her wicked reflection and it seemed to smile back and gesture to the side drawer. “Mmm why not, I deserve it.” She smirked as she opened the drawer and took out the vibrator and held it in her hand. Only this time she didn’t press it to make it rumble, instead it seemed to come on based on her thoughts. Even the button had disappeared.

As she slipped it into her wanting pussy she knew her reign was only starting and no one would be able to take it from her.

[focuriousity25-blog]

fin. ... 6/6 ab5042qjq ... Welp, it's finally here. The sixth and final? entry of the main 'I Remember' limited comics. It's been a long and expensive journey since the release of Part 1, but I'm honestly happy to have seen it through to the end ^^ I realize, in many ways, this whole thing's just a glorified OC-insert and crossover, but, at the end of the day this just goes to show how much a series like Tales of Arcadia can mean to a person, how a good story and characters can inspire you and what you can take away from them upon reaching the end. Case in point, when TOA's saga ended with the "Rise of the Titans" movie, I think it's to say the majority, uh... wasn't too happy with how it all concluded, and I'll admit, the desire to create Luke stemmed from a desire to...okay, not exactly "fix" that frown-inducing ending, but, expand upon it in a way so it's at least a little bit less hair-pullingly frustrating; thanks a lot, Guillermo del Toro. xD Speaking of which, Luke's story and this little AU of mine will continue in other formats, but it may be quite some time before he appears in any more comics; hope that's understandable. x}

I want to also give a huge thank you to @muku-gc . When @undeadchestnut disappeared, they really did me a solid by stepping in to draw part six, thank you so SO much, friend ^^ One more, thank you to @roesavalonsigma for allowing me to cameo her special roleplay character, Roes Sigma, who was also something of a cornerstone for Luke, but that's another story ;) I may make a master post providing a link to each comic in order, we'll see. Until then...thanks for sticking with me, means a lot :) ~HSeeker

[always-outlander]

Cracks in the Armor - William's unseen trust in Jamie

Over on TikTok, I received a comment from a follower insinuating that William must trust Jamie if he asks for his help with Jane and her sister, Fanny at the end of season 7.

I wanted to reply with a long-form explanation because there is an interesting passage in ‘Go Tell the Bees’ that leans into this idea of William not necessarily realizing his trust in Jamie until later on.

But first, I need to remind everyone of the differences between the book and the show when it comes to Jane's death. In Chapter 134 of ‘Written in My Own Hearts Blood,’ Jane’s burial scene takes place in Savannah, GA. Jane’s body is retrieved for Fanny and her burial is arranged with the help of Lord John Grey, not Jamie. John knows a family with a small private cemetery where Jane can be buried. To take one's own life is a sin, and so she cannot be buried in a churchyard. Jamie grapples with this in the books and he prays for Jane’s soul multiple times, despite his faith saying he shouldn’t.

At such time, John also has a conversation with Claire, where he learns that William sought out Jamie’s help. He had thought that William might but hoped he wouldn’t for both their sakes. When Claire asks where William is now, John tells her that he has left on an errand outside of the city and will return that night. 

John tells Claire to plan for the burial to take place the next morning, early, and Clare tells John about Ezekiel Richardson. In the books, he had recently paid a visit to Claire in her surgery in Savannah and asked Claire to spy on John and his family. This scene takes place earlier in the show while Claire is married to John.

Claire warns John that Richardson is with the Continental Army, and that [Richardson] “knows about you, what you are, I mean.” John asks Claire if she has any idea of how he came into the information and she does not.

The next day at the burial, William stands at the entrance to the cemetery while the rest of the group carries out the burial services. John is there, along with Jenny Murray, Marsali, Fergus, and their children, Rachel, Ian, and Fanny. This scene also takes place after Marsali and Fergus lose Henri-Christian, so it is a very sad moment for everyone in the books.

This chapter takes place in Claire’s POV, and she spots William holding the reigns of a very large horse, whose name is Miranda. He presents it to Fanny and tells her that it is hers now and that she ‘will need her.’ William looks up at Claire and asks “Will you look after her, mother Claire?” and Claire says of course they will.

Jamie and William have the talk about Geneva that we see on the TV series a day or so later before William leaves Savannah. It takes place on the docks where Jamie is working, and William does not say “I will never call you father” during that scene. In large part, I believe this to be a plot device used for a payoff in season 8 where William does call him father. 

In Chapter 12 of Go Tell the Bees, William is at Mount Josiah plantation in Virginia and is paid a visit by a man named John Cinnamon, and Manoke, the Indian Scout from Quebec that Lord John Grey told Claire about in their morning after scene. William is still in the midst of his crisis of identity and doesn’t know if he will stay at Mount Josiah or not. He wants to find out what is happening with his cousin Benjamin Grey. Ben had been reported dead of goal fever in New Jersey. This is later disproved when William discovers his grave and determines that the man in the grave is not Ben. 

William begins to think about how to make things right in his life before going on the quest to find Ben. He thinks about Rachel and Ian, and how nothing can be fixed between him and Rachel now that she is married. Then he thinks of Jane, and how that situation cannot be fixed (or removed from his memory).

Neither can his true paternity. After spending the night with Jamie on their mission to rescue Jane, there was no possible way for William to deny the truth.

He recalls Jamie telling him “Ye’ve a claim to my help for any venture ye deem worthy,” and how Fraser did help, at once and without question. Not just for Jane but also for her little sister, Francis.

There’s a lovely passage in Chapter 12 of Bee’s where William recalls Jane’s funeral, where he was unable to speak and full of grief. He had thrust Francis into Fraser’s arms and walked off, and William wonders why he had done that. He could have had Lord John help Francis, he was there, but William hadn’t even thought about giving her to John.

‘No. No, I am not sorry’ echoes in William’s ears and he recalls the touch of Jamie’s hand on his cheek. William chokes on his fish, coughs, and chokes again before the thoughts leave his mind.

I always interpret this scene as the first sort of crack in the armor for William. As he continues to have anxiety over who he is and the obligations that come with that, it is at this moment when he thinks of Jamie that provides clarity on the scene between them in the season seven finale. The show’s use of the line “I will never call you father” makes us believe that William has no appreciation for Jamie, but we can see in the books that he might be starting to view Jamie differently after all. 

What are your thoughts on William and Jamie’s final scene together in season 7?

[avatarofthelesbian]

what tma fear domains I THINK (my opinion etc leave me alone) arcane characters would be trapped in with little explanation that makes even less sense (yes the web is here twice. so is the extinction. its arcane what did you expect.):

vi: a desolation domain (everyone and everything she'd ever cared for burns around her. she was never materialistic, but there used to be people in those now-smoking ruins. there were people that turned away from her while she felt the flames on her own skin.)

caitlyn: a hunt domain (she can never rest in the chase. one moment to consider sparing those in her path is her loss. the chase consumes her, but it will never end.)

jinx: a spiral domain (are their faces real? are their words real? is she real?)

ekko: an extinction domain (he is out of time, and even he can't fix it this time. there is a world, and he knows he breathed life into it. he knows there were others. but it's just him now, and they were no match for those that sat and watched it fall to ruin. concrete and rusted metal is all that's left now, and he knows it burrows so deep no roots will grow past it.)

jayce: an eye domain (he has to know. what it is that he has to know, he doesn't know, and it might well destroy him. he knows he is watched, but it won't sway him frim the path of discovery.)

viktor: a flesh domain (no rambling explanation here. you heard the part in mag171 about the cutaway tulip.)

mel: a web domain (every twitch of her fingers yanks on the puppet-strings attached to them, and she doesn't know if she'd rather the puppet hate her or be none the wiser. she's trapped in another web, though, and the pattern must go up forever.)

ambessa: a slaughter domain (she knows the war has a purpose. all wars do. the moment-to-moment blood on her hands makes the memory of that purpose slip away.)

sevika: a lonely domain (there are people all around her, she knows. some of them might hate her, she thinks she might try to lead others. the fog drifts around her face - they don't know her. somebody might have, once, but she doesn't remember them.)

silco: a corruption domain (his home is riddled with holes. he tries to repair them, to build a place apart from this, but the rot persists. perhaps the rot is within him, and he carries it as his home crumbles at the edges. he cannot save it, dearly as the rot loves him.)

vander: a buried domain (he shouldn't be trapped here. where 'here' is, he doesn't know, but it's dark and pressing. he is needed, but every cry of his name pushes the walls closer. his throat is full of mud, even if he could find the words to do what he needs to.)

singed: an end domain (he can't stop. if he does, the end will come for them all. his steps are slow, slowed more as he drags with him what he loves, what must not be terminated. it follows, that invisible cloud of death, and it will catch him and all he holds dear.)

heimerdinger: an extinction domain (he knows he caused this, that he sat by until it was too late to save what literal remained of the world. there is nobody left now, as he wanders the decaying remnants of the lives that people had begged him to change. he is all that is left, and he will continue forever.)

maddie: a web domain (they hate her. she doesn't know who they are, but they hate her. her wooden jaw is moved as a voice that belongs to thousands of tiny things spills from her mouth. she has no control over the show, but perhaps this act is the one that the puppetmaster will admire. it won't be, as much as her character tries to imitate it.)

isha: a dark domain (she is a child, after all. something big is coming, she cannot see it or hear it but in the blackness she feels it. she can't scream, and nobody is coming. she doesn't know what is approaching.)

i feel like some of these (silco and maddie especially) only make sense to me. oh well.

[the-way-astray]

keefe would not like me and i don't like him: masterpost

hey everyone . . . there are too many freaking strieefe things now. sigh. so naturally it's time for a masterpost . . . but before that i should clear up some misconceptions probably

this is a bit. i am not actually mad. if i was i would make a more serious-toned post telling strieefe anons and non-anons to knock it off

having said that i am vehemently and utterly anti strieefe. awful, awful ship. horrendous. will fight the people that ship it until the day i die

this post explains the origins of strieefe

yes, i am okay with strieefe fics being posted to ao3 (i've had a couple of anons ask me this). if you happen to do this, tag me as stria sixteen. also send me the fic. i want to read it

i am not okay with smut (nobody has done this yet, but just to be clear) . . . but anything up until that point is fine. the makeout fic was fine. the only-one-bed trope was fine. the shirtless keefe was fine

please please please please if you are going to send me fics, name them. name them!!!! it doesn't have to be a profound, thoughtful name (this is strieefe, after all, cringe is expected). but all fics are tagged by their names, and it helps keep things organized, so please!!!! i also tag all asks i receive with the asker's url, so fics are also tagged by the writer's url (or anon)

the general strieefe tag (for me) is #keefe would not like me and i don't like him. it is blockable. do with this information what you will. other people may use different tags. if you don't want to see strieefe-related stuff at all, i also recommend blocking off #strieefe and #to strieefe or not to strieefe

alayda is a menace but i don't hate her. stop sending me weird asks about her. they will be deleted

katie is a traitor to the sokeefe nation

always forever by alayda (@alaydabug2) and @ishipstrieefe (pro)

chapter one

chapter two

chapter three

chapter four

never change by lisa (@lisalovesapplesauce) (pro)

chapter one

chapter two

chapter three

chapter four

hate your lover, love your hater, and be studied by her friend by doe (@worldsunlikemyown) (anti)

context

chapter one

chapter two

chapter three

chapter four

treehouse by treehouse anon (pro)

chapter one

pride pin by pride pin anon (anti)

chapter one

chapter two

sometimes grief is acceptance by alayda (pro)

chapter one

chapter two

hold me like a grudge by emelin (@thishumanformislimiting) (pro)

chapter one

miscellaneous alayda fics (pro)

high on your love

the way to my heart is an a+

love in the air

chapter forty-two au (actually this one might be anti)

only your warmth

crossover (converted to anti by by me)

miscellaneous non-alayda fics (disclaimer: some of these could barely even be considered fics)

unnamed fic by anon one (anti)

unnamed fic by cricket (@gay-witches-are-the-best) (anti)

unnamed fix-it fic of alayda's makeout fic by anon two (anti)

unnamed fic by a.j. (@lgbtqforeverything) (anti)

unnamed fic by @kotlcpuppetshow (anti)

unnamed fic by anon three (anti)

atlantis blows the fuck up by anon four (????)

unnamed fic by @oopsies-maeve-did-a-thing (pro)

fanart (will it never end)

by alex (@the-soul-detectives) (pro)

fanart of alayda's chapter forty-two au by aspen (@aspenaspenaspenaspenaspen) (pro)

fix-it fanart of high on your love (alayda's makeout fic) by aspen (anti)

by connie (@absolutely-existing) (anti)

by alayda (pro)

by emelin (pro)

by emelin part two (pro)

by fin (@fintan-pyren) (pro)

fucking. songs. (and song-adjacent things like poems.) what world do i live in

unlikely couple by katie (@myfairkatiecat) (pro)

a ballad of keefe and stria by emelin (pro)

[thenaughtynorth]

Breaking Judgment

After being betrayed by The Judgment Day, the reader destroys their locker room. Damian Priest, also betrayed by the faction, offers support and admits he cares for her. He stays the night to protect her, and the tension between them hints at something more brewing beneath the surface.

Damian Priest x female reader

Warnings: Kayfabe lmao

Word count: Roughly 2,700 and it’s actually proofread to the best of my ability

I love me some Damian Priest

———

The moment you slammed Finn’s leather jacket to the floor and stomped on it, the rage consuming you felt like a tidal wave. The Judgment Day had always been your family—or at least, that’s what they told you. Finn had been the leader, Liv the schemer, Raquel the enforcer, JD and Carlito two dumb stooges, and Dominik…well, Dom was just along for the ride. Together, they had made you believe you belonged. That you were one of them.

Until tonight.

“You’re just not good enough to run with us anymore,” Liv had sneered, her lips curling into a smirk that made your stomach churn. Raquel stood beside her, arms crossed, saying nothing. Finn didn’t even look at you as he passed judgment like it was beneath him to care. Dominik had just muttered an apology under his breath and avoided your eyes.

That was the moment something inside you snapped.

So here you were, standing in the middle of their trashed locker room, your breath heaving and your fists trembling. Clothes and gear were strewn everywhere. Finn’s jacket was ruined, Raquel’s duffel had been emptied out and dumped, and Liv’s makeup bag was shattered in the corner. But the pièce de résistance was Dom’s PS5, which now lay in pieces at your feet. The satisfying crack it made when you smashed it against the floor was the only thing that had brought you even a shred of satisfaction tonight.

But it still wasn’t enough.

“Feel better now?”

The deep voice behind you made you spin around, your heart lurching. Damian Priest stood in the doorway, his large frame blocking the exit. His dark eyes were fixed on the mess around you before settling on your face.

“What do you want, Damian?” you spat, your voice sharper than you intended.

He stepped into the room, closing the door behind him. “I saw what happened,” he said simply, his tone calm but firm.

“So what?” you shot back, crossing your arms over your chest. “Come to rub it in? Tell me you told me so? Because I don’t need it right now.”

Damian’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t rise to the bait. “Trust me, I’m not here to gloat. But you made a scene out there, and it’s only a matter of time before Finn and the others come looking for you. You’re lucky I found you first.”

You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. “Lucky? Yeah, sure. Real lucky. My so-called family just threw me to the curb, and now I’ve got nothing.”

“You think you had something with them?” Damian’s voice was sharper now, cutting through your self-pity like a blade. “They used you. The same way they used me. You were just too blind to see it.”

You flinched at his words, but deep down, you knew he was right. You’d been there when Damian was cast out, just like you were tonight. You’d stood by and done nothing, believing Finn’s lies that Damian had been the problem.

“That’s different,” you muttered, looking away.

“Is it?” Damian challenged, stepping closer. “Because it looks pretty damn familiar to me.”

You swallowed hard, your throat tightening as the weight of your mistakes pressed down on you. “I didn’t think they’d… I didn’t think it would end like this.”

“That’s because you let them get in your head,” Damian said bluntly. “They’re good at that. They make you think you’re part of something bigger, like they actually care about you. But the second you stop being useful to them? They throw you out like garbage.”

His words hit harder than you expected, and you felt your defenses crumbling. “So what now?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. “What am I supposed to do, Damian? Because I don’t have a clue.”

He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. For a moment, he looked like he was debating whether or not to answer. Then he stepped closer, his voice lowering.

“You do what I did,” he said. “You fight back. You don’t let them win. And you sure as hell don’t let them see you break.”

“And I’m supposed to just… do that on my own?” you asked, bitterness creeping into your tone.

Damian hesitated, his gaze softening slightly. “No,” he said quietly. “You’re not doing this on your own. You’ve got me.”

You blinked, caught off guard by his words. “Why would you help me?”

“Because I know what it feels like,” he admitted. “I know what it’s like to think you’ve found people who care about you, only to find out it was all a lie. And…” He trailed off, his eyes locking with yours. “Because I’ve always liked you. Even when you stabbed me in the back, I couldn’t bring myself to hate you.”

The confession made your breath catch, and for a moment, you didn’t know what to say. You’d spent so long convincing yourself that Damian was the enemy, that you hadn’t stopped to consider how he might have felt.

“Damian…” you started, but he held up a hand to stop you.

“Don’t,” he said, his tone firm but not unkind. “You don’t have to say anything. Just know that I’m here. And if you want to take them down? I’m with you.”

You nodded slowly, your chest tightening with a mixture of guilt and gratitude. “Okay,” you said quietly. “Let’s do it.”

Damian nodded, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Good. But first, we’re getting out of here before Finn finds this mess.” He glanced around the room, letting out a low whistle. “Nice touch with the PS5, by the way.”

You couldn’t help the faint smirk that crossed your lips. “He had it coming.”

“Yeah, he did,” Damian said, opening the door and motioning for you to follow. “Come on. Let’s get you out of here.”

As you walked out of the destroyed locker room, a part of you felt lighter—like, for the first time in weeks, you weren’t completely alone.

The parking lot was eerily quiet as Damian’s car sped down the road, the hum of the engine filling the heavy silence between you. The adrenaline from trashing The Judgment Day’s locker room had long since worn off, leaving behind a cold ache in your chest. Damian sat in the driver’s seat, his expression unreadable as his hands gripped the wheel.

“You really went all in back there,” he said suddenly, his tone neutral but edged with something you couldn’t quite place.

“They deserved it,” you muttered, staring out the window.

“Yeah,” Damian agreed, though his voice was flat. “But that doesn’t mean it was smart.”

You turned to glare at him, anger bubbling up again. “I didn’t ask for your opinion.”

“No, you didn’t,” he said calmly, his eyes fixed on the road. “But I’m giving it anyway. You think smashing their stuff is going to fix anything? You think Finn’s just going to shrug and let it go?”

You clenched your jaw, guilt and frustration twisting in your stomach. “I don’t care what Finn thinks,” you snapped.

Damian let out a dry laugh, shaking his head. “Yeah, you do. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be this worked up about it.”

His words hit too close to home, and you turned back to the window, refusing to let him see the tears threatening to spill over.

“Look,” Damian said after a long moment, his tone softening just enough to cut through your defenses. “I get it. They screwed you over. I know what that feels like. But if you’re going to survive this, you need to start thinking with your head instead of your emotions.”

The truth in his words stung, but you couldn’t deny it. “I didn’t know what else to do,” you admitted quietly, your voice barely audible over the hum of the car.

“That much was obvious,” he muttered, his tone still sharp but lacking malice.

Silence settled between you again, heavy and oppressive. You fidgeted with the hem of your shirt, your mind racing with everything that had happened tonight. Finally, you forced yourself to speak.

“Why are you really helping me, Damian?” you asked, your voice trembling. “After everything I did to you—why do you even care?”

Damian sighed, his grip on the wheel tightening. “I told you. I know what it’s like to be where you are right now. And maybe I should walk away. Maybe I should let you deal with this on your own.” He glanced at you briefly, his dark eyes softening. “But I can’t. You know why.”

You sat there in silence, the weight of his words from earlier settling over you as the car pulled into the hotel parking lot. Did he actually like me?

The elevator ride to your room was tense and quiet. You could feel Damian’s presence beside you, solid and reassuring despite the tension in the air. When you reached your door, you hesitated, your hand hovering over the key card reader.

“Something wrong?” Damian asked, his voice breaking the silence.

You swallowed hard, your chest tightening with fear. “What if they come after me?” you asked, your voice trembling. “What if this isn’t over?”

“It’s not over,” Damian said bluntly. “But that doesn’t mean you have to let them win. You’re not with them anymore. You don’t owe them anything.”

“I know,” you said quietly, though the fear in your chest didn’t subside.

Damian sighed, his voice softening slightly. “You’ll be fine,” he said. “But if it makes you feel better, I’ll stay.”

Your head snapped up to look at him, surprise flickering across your face. “You’d do that?”

He shrugged, his expression neutral. “Yeah. Just for tonight. Don’t get used to it.”

You nodded quickly, swiping the key card and pushing the door open. “Thank you,” you said quietly, stepping inside.

The room was small and unremarkable, but it felt like a safe haven after the chaos of the night. You sat on the edge of the bed, your hands fidgeting in your lap as Damian leaned against the wall, arms crossed, his eyes fixed on you like he was still analyzing every move you made.

“You need to get some rest,” he said, his tone leaving no room for argument.

“And what about you?” you asked, glancing at him.

“I’ll keep watch,” he said simply, “make sure they don’t do some stupid shit.”

You frowned, guilt gnawing at you. “You don’t have to do that.”

“Yes, I do,” he said firmly. “Because I’m not letting Finn and the others blindside you. Not on my watch.”

His words sent a strange warmth through your chest, but you pushed the feeling aside. “You could sit on the bed, you know,” you said reluctantly. “It’s big enough.”

Damian raised an eyebrow, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. “You sure about that?”

You rolled your eyes, though your cheeks burned. “I’m not going to kick you out if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“I’m more worried about whether or not you can keep your hands to yourself,” he chuckled, leaving you speechless. Had the circumstances been any different, he might’ve had a good point.

He kicked off his sneakers and moved to sit on the bed, making you super aware of his ginormous figure next to you. The warmth was radiating off of him, and it was as if the darkness had heightened your other senses, because my god did he smell incredible.

The silence was heavy, but it carried a different kind of tension now. You shifted, lying back on your side of the bed, staring up at the ceiling. You couldn’t stop your mind from racing—about Finn, Liv, Raquel, Dominik, and most of all, Damian.

“I still don’t get why you’re doing this,” you said quietly, glancing over at him. “Why you care so much.”

Damian turned his head to look at you, his dark eyes unreadable. “I told you. I really care about you.” He leaned back, resting on one elbow as his voice dipped lower. “You’re not just some teammate to me. You never were. I thought maybe the feelings had gone away, but mierda, I still fucking adore you.”

Your breath caught at the intensity in his gaze. “Damian…”

“I’m not looking for apologies or promises,” he interrupted, his voice calm but firm. “I’m just telling you the truth. Whether you believe it or not is up to you.”

The room suddenly felt warmer, the air charged with an unspoken tension. You weren’t sure what to say, your emotions tangled in a mess of guilt, fear, and something far more dangerous.

“You should get some sleep,” Damian said, his tone softer now but no less commanding. “You’ve had a long night.”

You nodded, lying back fully against the pillows. But as you closed your eyes, you felt the mattress shift slightly, Damian’s presence grounding you in a way that made your heart race.

“Damian?” you murmured, your voice hesitant.

“Yeah?”

You hesitated, your throat dry. “Thank you. For… everything.”

He didn’t respond right away, but then you felt him shift closer—just barely—and his voice dropped to a near-whisper.

“Don’t make me regret it, baby” he said, his tone carrying an edge that sent a shiver down your spine.

You nodded, your heart pounding as you felt the weight of his words settle over you. And as the tension in the room hung heavy, sleep felt like the furthest thing from your mind.

[idkkprincess]

Somebody That He Used To Know

Analyzing a little more on Post-Amnesia Shadow coming to face with his past.

Honestly, while Dark Beginnings did a great job showing us of the relationship between Shadow and Maria, Generations showed us what Shadow meant to Maria.

Not what Maria meant to Shadow, because this Shadow isn't her Shadow. He's different. Whatever fully happened on the ARK is lost.

And while, Maria cares for him regardless of what he can become. She knows something is wrong. She knows she hasn't seen him in a long time. She knows he's gone through things, she could only imagine.

This Shadow, has recovered from amnesia post-dying post-brainwashing, he only knows of Maria in certain aspects. He's never actually met her. It's kinda similar to his Pre-Genesis Archie counterpart, who never met her but knows of her and knows the pain of losing her. He knows so much about her because of how much her death has impacted his life. He doesn't really know why she cared for him, only that she did.

To Shadow, seeing both Gerald and Maria brings up things that he knows happened it's just that he doesn't recall them happening. He saved Maria, not because she was Maria, but because it was someone in danger.

A lot of what he does in the game with Maria is trying to reason with her. Especially with Maria's wish, because that is literately all he knows about her other than a few things here and there.

There hasn't been any confirmation that all of his memories have returned. Dark Beginnings, shows that he remembers part of things, especially closer to the ARK Incident. Even then, his memories are used more as a taunting devices from Black Doom than anything else most of the time.

I also still think he feels guilty about he death. He remembers most of his strong emotions, such feeling inadequate of failing at being her cure, her sacrifice to save him, or just the fact that he knew he wasn't going to fit in. Which he also still questions at the end of the Dark Beginnings because that is the only thing that is still relevant to his life.

At the end of the day, the ARK incident doesn't matter. He can't go back and fix it. Even Gerald tells him to not tamper the time stream. I think the reason why the "Let Me Save Gerald and Maria" story idea got dropped is because he has little to no idea who these people are or were to him now. At the beginnings he knows he should precent thier deaths, but at the same time he's busy. He learns more about them, more about his purpose and who they were. Because Gerald and Maria don't know him anymore and he doesn't know them that much either.

And that's why he cries again at the end of the game, because for the first time in a long time, his heart and his mind make sense. He finally understands why this hurt him as much as it did back then. He finally realizes why Gerald wanted to destroy the world and he seemed fine with it until he wasn't.

Shadow also seemed to understand why Maria seemed more important than Gerald in his mind. She stood by him and supported him to do better. Maria coddled Shadow. She was the supporting words that would guide him to be who needed to be. Unlike Gerald who kinda just let him do what he wanted. Gerald had the belief that Shadow would do the right thing, he's a scientist who believes in his work. For Maria, this is her first time understanding that people would grow and they would be something you can't control. Shadow is his own person at the end of the day, not something you plan out methodically. It was all experimental.

Shadow has always wanted them back for some odd reason he tends to bury. He just finally understood why and couldn't bear it.

“That which inspires us to our greatest good is also the cause of our greatest evil.” - Viktor, Arcane

[utilitycaster]

I was reading your posts about interesting moments in CR3 and different possibilities that could’ve added positively to the campaign and the party split was an interesting point. Honestly I can’t help but wonder that if we had one party who

1- met guests who had a positive relationship with different gods (there are 12 Primes right? Why did both parties end up interacting with Pelor) to broaden the knowledge through player-player interactions

2- were sent to a place with a mix of religion and culture and explore a region with NPCs offering a different viewpoint

Because honestly as much as I enjoyed the split, I felt kinda bummed out that both parties experienced even more negative feedback re: the gods: Deanna forced to come back by a god or the village being taken over and forced by a religious group. Even more so when it was Pelor in focus both times and he is one of the harshest ones.

If one party had a different experience, because none of them had any personal experience and were mostly working off their own hurts when asked ‘should the gods be killed’, then maybe the debate when they reunited could’ve been different. Instead of Orym being the only one to say ‘Ludinus is bad guys.’

It felt like having someone be horrified at their gods being killed would be a good shock to the ‘meh’ reaction the party was constantly having. Or the guests being meh about it too (or it just being a weird comedy improv moment).

I wasn’t on tumblr, but were people wondering why both instances were negative religiously? Do you think it could’ve impacted the group positively if Matt had made the encounters different?

Hi anon, I mean this as kindly as possible but I have repeatedly been saying for literally over a year at this point that the issue is not that Bells Hells lacks a pro-god member. I feel like I get questions like this every few months and I say something like this every few months and I know it's a fandom and I don't expect everyone to read every post on my blog but like, I do have to read every post on my blog and it's getting tiresome.

Bells Hells had a pro-god member in FCG and were frequently pretty belittling and unkind to them about that, frankly, until the moment of their death. I also think (and iirc Aabria has clarified out of game) that Deanna is not in fact mad at Pelor. She has a lot of issues with the actions of other worshipers, and she has complicated feelings, but I would not under any circumstances say her perception of the Dawnfather was negative. I also think she is something of a Keyleth case, of "if I do not let out this anger towards a deity, it will be directed towards the person I'm actually mad at, whom I love, and that's much harder to face and process, so I will be shaking my fist at the sky instead." I also think that the character of Bor'Dor is a great example of the awful manipulation that the Ruby Vanguard took part in and how like most cults they destroy the lives of their followers, rendering them unable to see outsiders as anything but the enemy, and that most people don't escape.

If you are dealing with people whose genuine reason for enabling what amounts to either genocide or extinction of a species, depending on your perspective, is "I asked for help from them [in a vague and indirect sense] and never received it", having someone else say "well I had help and it was great" is not going to change their minds. The thing that would have fixed Bells Hells is, as someone else said, having significant ties to the world outside of each other, who they've at most known for 2 years and change. As is they have little investment or care for any of the other people of Exandria while claiming to be their voice. You do not need a love of the gods to make, as Caduceus said, the kind choice. You do need a love, or at least an effort made in the direction of love, for the mortals of Exandria and Ruidus, and they do not have that. And from an outside perspective again we can discuss that this is largely a failure on the DM-ing side but within the context of the story that is the problem, that this is the behavior of people who spend more time arguing in favor of people who are long dead (after uh. trying their own genocide) than in the presence of the many common people on Exandria and Ruidus who are alive.

[kitalphahart]

Stardew Bachelor/ette headcanons

Some may actually be canon? Or quasi-canon. Keep in mind that my character is like me in the aspect of not choosing any of them to marry. I might do Krobus as a roommate, but that's about it

Leah: was the newest arrival until the farmer showed up. Wasn't looking for a relationship after the whole fiasco with Kel, and generally keeps to herself. Is somewhat closr to Robin due to both working with wood, albeit in different ways, and Elliot for being the only other person in the town who doesn't have a connection to someone who is or was part of it. As a result, she's a stranger to lost the townsfolk

Maru: would be an anxious wreck if she weren't medicated. Tried to get close to her half-brother all the time as a kid, but slowly stopped as he kept pushing her away. She does wish they could connect, though she doesn't know how or where to start. She enjoys working with Harvey, but outside work she can't really stand him. Would call him a weenie if she used that sort of language

Haley: is materialistic because that's how her parents spoiled her to hide their not-that-great parenting. Secretly she wishes she wasn't like that, but feels she can't truly change it. Besides, she occasionally gets pretty clothes from her parents and she can't not wear them, even if only once. Even if they are the wrong size, which they usually are. Got into photography due to her sister gifting her a cheap Polaroid camera

Emily: is into mysticism out of spite against her parents. Makes her own clothes out of spite as well. She hates her parents, but would never say so. Sandy is an ex, the two realized they are better as friends than dating, which is why they're still on good terms. Some people don't believe they broke up, and if the Farmer marries her, Sandy makes them a throuple. She doesn't like Clint but gets the feeling that if she rejects him he'll go psycho stalker

Abigail: is actually really good at using a sword. Marlon has given her lessons in secret, and sees her as an excellent apprentice. If only her father wasn't such a--. Forced by her mother to take flute lessons at first, but ended up enjoying them. If she crosses paths with the Farmer heading to the mines, she wants to join. Even if the monsters do scare her. Once she dyed her hair purple, not only did it not fade, nothing else sticks. Even stripping the color has it come back the next morning

Penny: wants a large family with someone loyal to her so she can raise her kids right, not the way she was raised. An excellent teacher for young kids, the main thing holding her back from being properly educated and certified to teach is her mother's drinking habits. She wishes she lived somewhere she could feel pride, but instead has the short stick and has to make do. She took up reading to get away from her negligent father and later abusive mother. Educating others was the next step in her mind, and she's doing what she can with what she has. The war doesn't make getting new textbooks easy, however

Sam: does not know how to act now that his dad is back. He's been Man of the House for so long, and now he's not. Focused on making a band and his guitar to compensate. Is actually good at composing music, but his aimless wandering for band type and music keeps him from getting anywhere. He ends up making music for kid's shows because he gets some variety, at least. Is aware that Vincent looks up to him and tries to be a good role model. Barring the skateboarding. He's toned it down a lot since his brother was born, but he's not above stunts

Sebastian: pushed his half-sister away first out of anger that him mom remarried, then because she's a girl and cooties, and now doesn't know how to fix the rift. Has depression, but it shows as isolation. He's seen how Shane gets and does not want to be like that. Better to stay in his room all day. A natural night owl, he chafes at daytime hours. His mom doesn't understand, and his step-father certainly won't. Speaking of, the two only interact as necessary. Sebby does not like him, and made it clear as a kid, pushing him away like he did Maru. This rift he feels is far too late to fix, and doesn't care (he claims) to fix it

Elliott: he has fallen for Leah, but won't admit it. Not after hearing about her ex and how they affected her. While he loves the idea of being the knight in shining armor rescuing her, he's too shy to do so. Even so, he is striking up a friendship with her because her sculptures are beautiful to him, and give him ideas for his novel. He does wish he could buy one, though. Or be gifted one. Is close to Willy as well. Proximity helps, but he's also fascinated by the stories the fisher has to tell. Even if some have been repeated and exaggerated over retellings

Harvey: actually had a hard time keeping up with a lot of stuff in his clinic until he hired Maru. He knows she's the reason the place stays afloat, and does all he can to keep her. In a professional manner, he loves her. In a personal manner, he has respect for her, but does not see her as a potential romantic interest. Has a late girlfriend who died from an incurable disease back in high school, motivating him to become a doctor after his fear of heights and bad eyes kept him from aviation. He won't ever admit it, but he's happy where he's at. Even if his diet is shit. Takes pride in his 'stashe

Shane: despite being Jas' godfather, he forgets about her a lot, especially when drunk. Losing his friends aka her parents, an injury keeping him from remaining in sports, and losing his dreams turned him to drinking to cope, and now he's in a rut he can't get out of. Not without help, anyway. Marnie is worried about him, and also concerned as to how he got her white and brown chickens to start popping out blue ones. What's next, pink chickens??? Constantly has stubble because the doesn't remember to shave. Or he does but since he uses an electric razor, forgets to plug it in, turn it on, or otherwise have it operate

Alex: knows he washed up, won't admit to it. His primary reason for not actually going pro and only bragging about it is because he doesn't want to leave his grandparents behind to find for themselves. He misses his mother every day, though he believes he cannot admit to it. He is a man, after all. Men don't miss people. Or cry. Under his manly man persona is a sensitive man, in touch with his emotions, but he doesn't want to admit that

Krobus: learned to talk from Gil after being found as an orphaned shadow beast. While he's reconnected to his people, he still feels different from them, having been raised by a human. He got his name after his kin discovered his upbringing, hoping that he can bring peace to their kind, as not all shadow beasts are monsters. Sadly, too many are interested in fighting to make things work

[mischievouslittlecreature]

Part 26: Do You Love Me

Summary: As Lucy continues to pull further away, Tommy tries to bridge the growing schism between them.

Word Count: 6,398

Warnings: Angst, insecurity, suicidal thoughts, chronic pain, sexual harassment, and references to infidelity and sexual content.

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Chapter 11: Kiss Me Where I Break

Tommy was beginning to worry that he might have broken her.

She said next to nothing the entire train ride from Birmingham to London, all his attempts at initiating conversation met with one word answers or just quiet hums in acknowledgement while she stared out the window. Eventually, he just gave up and decided to leave her alone.  

The past few days had been utterly hellish. He kept forgetting that Lucy wasn’t at the house anymore. He’d be in the throes of work, and call out for her, only to realize a second later that no one was coming. She wasn’t a simple holler away anymore.

He missed her almost more than he could bear. He had gotten so used to her always being there. Right by his side. To help him, to talk to him. To just…be there when he needed her. It was like someone had amputated one of his limbs.

But being around her during the workday did little to soothe the ache of her absence. Both because of the guilt that chewed away at him at every glance into her sad eyes, but also because something had undeniably changed between them. There was a schism between them now, ever since he had told her about Lizzie’s deal. Lucy was more distant, more subdued. Like the bright spark that she always carried with her had been suddenly snuffed out. He missed her, even when she was standing right in front of him. 

He wanted his Lucy back. 

For a while, he had thought that perhaps she was immune to him and the darkness that he carried. And yet in the end he had sapped out her light; broken her like he did everyone else close to him. 

He rolled his unlit cigarette between his fingers as he strode down the hallways of Westminster. Frustration crackled beneath his skin. His meeting earlier that day with Aberama had gone well. Aberama had agreed to postpone his planned killing of McCavern. And he was planning to propose to Polly. But despite the recent string of accomplishments, Tommy felt no joy or relief. If anything, he felt even worse.    

He couldn’t help the prickle of jealousy he felt towards Polly and Aberama. How fucking lucky they were, to actually be marrying someone that they truly loved. 

He eyed the golden band on his left hand disdainfully. It felt more like a shackle than a wedding ring.

Pushing open the door to his office, he chanced a glance at where Lucy was sitting, bent over a few documents with her fists pressed to her temples, elbows on the desk in front of her. Her lips were tilted downwards. Next to her, the fresh bouquet of sunflowers he’d sent was perched on the edge of her desk. He opened his mouth, considering asking her if she wanted to go out to dinner, then closed it. Why bother? He already knew that she was going to say no. 

Still, worry festered at the edges of his already frayed mind, longing to fix what he had so stupidly broken. He needed her. Everything was ten times harder without her there to lighten the load. He hadn’t even fully realized just how much he’d come to rely on her emotional support until it had been ripped away.  

He didn’t know what to do to make any of this better. They had never had problems before. Sure, they’d had their squabbles and arguments from time to time, but they never lasted long. When it came to Lucy, this was entirely new territory for him.     

Wandering into his own office, he tossed the folder of papers he was holding down, reaching for the decanter usually filled with whiskey only to find it empty. Scowling, suddenly deeply irritable, he opened a drawer and snatched the large bottle inside, taking a slow swig. A soft sigh left his lips, eyes briefly slipping closed as the cool liquid slid down his throat.

With the meetings with McCavern, Chang, and Aberama, he had barely had time to stop to catch his breath.

Without even so much as a knock, the door to his office opened, and, of all people, Mosley came slithering in. Tommy quickly stashed the bottle back into the drawer and wiped at his mouth, turning to face him. Those dark eyes of Mosley’s narrowed, voice doing little more than to set Tommy’s teeth on edge as he discussed the invitation Tommy had extended to him to the ballet performance at Arrow House for Lizzie’s birthday. As the conversation continued, Tommy moved to sit in his chair behind his desk, suddenly eager to have some sort of barrier between them. 

Mosley eyed him up like an animal waiting to pounce when he started speaking of his past acquaintance with Lizzie. No doubt hoping for some sort of reaction from his words. Tommy kept his hands laced tightly in his lap, hoping that the other man didn’t see the way his fingers tightened against each other.  

“Well, if you recognize her, maybe you can talk about old times, eh?”

“Maybe, if we have met before, your wife and I could even renew our acquaintance. I am invited to stay the night, yes?”

It was becoming increasingly hard for him to remember why he continued to tolerate Mosley’s presence. With each passing moment the temptation was growing stronger to grab the gun in his drawer or use the blades in his cap to slice the man to pieces. Or to perhaps call Lucy in and have her deal with the fascist piece of shit. That could be fun.

Speaking of Lucy, perhaps now would be a good time to let Mosley know about the research he’d asked her to do on the MP.

“I too have done some research, Sir Oswald,” he allowed his eyes to narrow a fraction. “Yeah. I researched your wife. And your wife’s younger sister. And your wife’s stepmother, Lady Curzon. All of whom you are fucking. If such things were to take place on a narrowboat, the church would get involved.”

“But…” Mosley’s voice was but a whisper, “it’s not happening on a narrowboat.”

“No. It’s taking place in your apartment, in your country house, sometimes even in your office here in the House of Commons.” He clicked his tongue disapprovingly. “So no secrets. And yes. Yes, you are invited to stay the night with whichever member of your family finds favor. Now, if you don’t mind, I was about to leave. I need to lock up my office.”

Mosley looked at him for a long moment, smoking casually. “Funny,” he said finally, “how disapprovingly you speak of my liaisons. Considering that lovely redhead that you always keep so close to you. Pretty thing. A bit plain, for my taste, to tell you the truth, but still. Lovely.” Tommy’s stomach churned. “Tragic past too, poor thing. She’s been working for you for many years now, hasn’t she?” Mosley cocked his head. “And I hear that she has quite the array of talents. Tell me, was it her that you had do your research on me?” He didn't wait for a response. “Wonderous job, if it was. Very few people know about my particular relationship with the Lady Curzon. Perhaps I should borrow her, at some point. I’m sure that she could be of the utmost use to me.” 

Tommy felt like he was going to throw up. Mosley took another long, slow drag from his cigarette, eyes not once leaving Tommy’s.

“Actually, I will come alone,” he said, finally, in response to Tommy’s invitation. “In society, you are judged by your hospitality. I will expect adventure.” He leaned across Tommy’s desk to put his cigarette out in the ashtray. Tommy was certain that if he had to hear that man lecture him one more time about the ‘rules of society,’ he was going to scream. Mosley straightened. “Such rogues we are, aren’t we? Sing like songbirds in the House. And then afterwards, relieve ourselves in the bodies of whomever we choose. Two men for whom forbidding is forbidden,” he raised the little paper that was his invitation, “should be quite the party.”

Tommy managed a smile that was more of a grimace, and Mosley finally, finally slunk his way out of the office. He pressed a hand to his face once the door closed, mind whirling. The idea of letting Mosley near Lucy or Lizzie made his skin crawl and stomach heave. And yet he was going to do it. To let the man waltz right into his home on an invitation. His hand trembled. Neither of them deserved him. Lucy’s sad eyes and Lizzie’s resentful gaze danced in his mind. He should have left them both alone. They would be better off now, if he had. Rather than latching onto them and dragging them down with him into the depths of hell. He’d only wanted to help them, and yet all he had accomplished was ruining their lives. And that wasn’t even counting this current mess he had made. A mess that he had no idea how to fix without hurting at least one of them.              

His eyes flickered down to the topmost right drawer of his desk, hand pulling it open almost of its own accord. The gun sat atop the papers stacked inside. Tommy let his hand fall from the handle, eyes still fixed on the gun. He leaned forward with an exhale against his desk, head bowed and eyes squeezed shut. There was a breath echoing in his mind. Slow and steady with its inhales and exhales. He rested both hands on the back of his head, rubbing at the skin in an attempt to quell the swirl of self hatred that he was drowning in. The room was suddenly very dark and cold.

“You have to listen to the voices that you hear.”

His head snapped upwards, eyes wide open. No.

“Do what they tell you to do.”

The breaths were continuing. Her breaths. Her last breath as she died in his arms. Yet another one of the women in his life that he failed despite the amount in which he cared for her.

“You don’t even have to rub the lamp anymore to summon the genie,” Grace continued to speak from where she was standing in the corner. A shiver ran down Tommy’s spine. Grace raised a hand, and dangling from her fingers on a chain was the massive blue sapphire, the one he had locked around her throat. His greed having sealed her fate. “It wasn’t the blue stone, Tommy. It was you,” she pressed the necklace to her chest. He could hear her heartbeats now, a rapid thumping in his head. The drip of blood running from her chest to the floor. Tommy’s hand tightened into a fist. He couldn’t look at her. At those accusatory eyes. “It was you.”

There was a soft knock on the door. “Tommy?” Lucy’s voice called.

The breaths and heartbeats faded away. Grace vanished from sight. Tommy leaned backwards, squeezing his eyes shut tight and exhaling. “Just a minute, Luce,” he choked out. He forced deep breaths to pass through his lips, pushing the panic attack down with each one. Eyes finally opening, he pushed the open drawer with the gun in it closed, sitting up and straightening himself out. “Yeah?”

The door cracked open and Lucy poked her head in, a folder tucked under her arm. She stepped into the room, walking to his desk and holding the folder out to him. “I need you to sign these.”

He took the folder from her, scribbling his signature on the dotted line of the documents inside. Lucy passed a hand over her hair. 

“I sent Adam home. What did Mosley want?”

“To talk about ballet.”

She snorted. “He’s really coming then?”

“Yep,” he handed her back the folder.

“Goody for us,” her voice dripped with sarcasm. Tommy grunted in response. Lucy tucked the folder back under her arm. Her brown eyes swept over him, carefully. “Are you alright?”

Tommy rubbed a hand over his face. “Yeah. Just been a long day.”

She didn’t look like she believed him, but nodded, heading back towards the door. “I’ll go get these filed.”

He watched her disappear out the door. “Thank you.” 

He remained reclined back in his chair for a few more minutes, until his breathing had fully evened out and he felt a little less like if someone touched him he might collapse. He glanced back towards the door that led to Lucy and Adam’s office area. When this business was done and the mess between them straightened out, he needed to do something nice for her. He tried to think back to the last time they had done something, just the two of them, that didn’t have anything to do with work in the past several weeks. His brow furrowed at the conclusion that he couldn’t think of anything outside of stolen kisses and touches in dark corners or in her room at Arrow House. Tommy frowned, lips pursing together, another wave of guilt slicing through his being at the way he had been unintentionally neglecting his lover. He realized, with a shuddering of utter horror, that he could not remember the last time he had even simply held her.     

Shaking his head, Tommy reached into his pocket to check the time on his watch. It was getting late. He stood from his chair, locking up the drawers in his desk that housed sensitive documents, stuffing a few files into his briefcase, and heading out the door, locking that too behind him. Lucy was sitting at her desk, riffling through some papers. He gently touched her shoulder.           

“It’s getting late,” he said softly. “We should lock up.”

She looked up at him, nodding wordlessly and beginning to stack the papers she had been working on, slipping them into a folder and locking them away in the filing cabinet kept in the corner. Tommy watched her cautiously. He reached out a hand to wrap around her wrist, brow furrowing at how cold her skin felt. 

“We could go to the apartment tonight,” he offered. He knew it wasn’t much. Certainly not enough considering what he was putting her through. But it was the best he could think to offer at the moment. 

Lucy looked down at the floor for a moment, and when she looked up at him those dark brown eyes were shiny. 

“Lizzie’s bringing Charlie and Ruby up to visit the office tomorrow,” she reminded him gently. Tommy blinked. He had forgotten. He’d promised to show them around Westminster and then take them all out to lunch.

“So?” he asked, fingers remaining wrapped around her wrist. Lucy gave him a look.

“I’m assuming that you’d like to be able to hold your daughter’s hand while you show her around?” 

Alright, he definitely deserved that one. 

“And you have an appointment this evening with Dr. Brooke.”

“I remember,” he sighed, letting go of her wrist and shoving his hands deep into his pockets, eyes glancing out the window while he frowned. “It’ll be too late after I'm done to go back to Birmingham.”

“I was thinking that while you’re at your appointment I’d follow up on some research on Mosley’s associates,” Lucy added. “And I need to pick up Lizzie’s birthday presents.”  

“And what did I get her this year?”

“A diamond necklace she’s been eyeing in the magazines. Part of the same collection as those earrings you got her in Paris that she likes so much.” 

He touched her face lightly. “Whatever would I do without you?”  

Her lips twitched upwards into a small smile, though her eyes still looked sad. Tommy let his thumb stroke over her bottom lip. He just wanted to see her smile again. A real smile. The kind that she would often shoot at him from across the room at family meetings or during the workday. Mischievous and bright and warm enough to thaw even his ice cold heart.

“Alright, I’ll go to my appointment and run some errands in town. You go pick up the gifts, do your work. We’ll meet back at the apartment.” At her raised eyebrow he held up his hands. “We just won’t fuck. I promise that I won’t try to maul you.”

That earned him a small, amused snort. “You think Lizzie will believe that?”

He sighed deeply. “Let me worry about Lizzie.”

Lucy nodded. “Okay,” she went to grab her coat from its hook. Tommy wetted his lips as he watched her, reaching out again to touch her arm lightly.

“Maybe…maybe after Lizzie and the kids have gone back home…”

“A day on either side, remember?”

“Yes, but we could still plan on the day after…”

“Why does it matter so much?” she asked, voice suddenly sharpening. “It’s not like you’re not still getting any.”

Tommy had to suppress a flinch. “It’s not the same…” he tried to argue softly. Lucy sighed and looked away, fiddling with her rings. He cocked his head, taking a cautious step towards her. “And what about you, eh?”

Her breath came out in a shaky exhale. “I’m fine.”

“You’re clearly not…”

“Can we talk about this later, please?” she looked around the office, shifting uncomfortably. “Not here.”

Tommy wanted to argue, because not speaking of it was driving him mad. But he held his tongue. He was worried that if he pushed her too hard on it, she’d just retreat even further away inside herself. Besides, it would give him the opportunity to keep working on Lizzie and coming up with his own solutions to the problem. Any conversation that they had about it was surely to go better if he came to her with a potential fix already in hand. 

“Okay.”

She gave him a grateful look, shoulders relaxing at the reprieve. Tucking his hands into his pockets, he cocked his head. 

“What time do you think you’ll be back?” 

“Late. Probably around midnight. Maybe one.” That wasn’t uncommon when she was doing her spy work for him. 

“Be careful.”

She smiled another smile that still did not quite meet her eyes. “Always.”

He watched her leave with his hands shoved deep into his pockets, worried frown set like stone onto his face.

∗ ∗ ∗

Lizzie sighed, flopping down onto the couch in one of the large sitting rooms in Arrow House, the children playing in front of her on the rug near the fireplace. She smiled softly as she watched them, appreciating the way Charlie played so gently with his half-sister. Such a sweet kid. She wondered, sometimes, if that was what Tommy was like. Before the war.

Long fingers adjusting on her cigarette, Lizzie’s eyes caught on the chessboard sitting on the table, the little pieces all arranged into their starting positions. A memory of Lucy sitting down unceremoniously in front of her one evening, chessboard clutched in her hands, played within her mind.

“Play with me, Lizzie?” she had asked, widening those big brown eyes at her. Lizzie had shifted uncomfortably, suddenly embarrassed.

“I don’t know how to play,” she admitted. Lucy shrugged.

“That’s alright. I’ll teach you,” she spoke without missing a beat. At Lizzie’s apprehensive look she groaned dramatically. “C’mon Lizzie, please? I’m bored. Tommy’s busy. No one else will play with me,” she had flashed her that teasing, mischievous smile. “I’ll be your best friend.” 

It had been hard not to relent, when Lucy was looking at her so hopefully, eyes dancing and playful. One game turned into several, and soon it had become a sort of tradition between the two of them.

Lizzie frowned at the sharp ache of missing the little redhead that throbbed in her chest. 

Her absence felt like a gaping hole had been ripped open in the middle of the house. Everyone’s moods–even the staffs’--had taken a turn towards melancholy. The children weren’t as joyful when they played. Cyril was depressed and barely eating. Trouble paced the halls while crying, but hissed and scratched at anyone who so much as tried to come near her. The horses in the stables were gloomy.

A chill seemed to have swept over the entire house. Even the fires lit in the hearths at night didn’t seem as warm. Tommy spent most of his time holed up in his office, his mood somehow even darker than it had been before. He yelled at everyone more often. And one evening, when she couldn’t sleep and had wandered down to the library for a book, she was pretty sure that she heard him weeping. 

What the fuck have I done?

Head falling back against the couch, Lizzie breathed out an exhale of smoke tiredly. Her glazed over eyes watched Ruby play with one of her dolls, raising her cigarette to her lips for another drag. 

Ever since Lucy had moved out, she had been considering what she wanted to do. 

When she had put the phone down after calling the solicitor in London, she had made the decision to stay. But not for Tommy. Not really. It had been for the children. For the house. For the luxury and money and status that Tommy had gifted her when he signed their marriage license. All he’d asked for in exchange was that she care for his home and children, and allow him to be with his lover. 

She had made a promise, when she married Tommy. She had swore to him that his relationship with Lucy would be allowed to stand. That she wouldn’t interfere, or make things difficult for them to be together. She had promised the same thing to Lucy.

Poor Lucy, who had only ever tried to be her friend.

Christ, she hadn’t even realized how big of a presence Lucy had in the house, in all their lives–in her life–until she was gone. 

She fucking missed her. Missed the way she always seemed to sense when Lizzie needed a break from the kids and was happy to take them off her hands for a few hours. Missed the way she’d always make her an extra cup of tea whenever she fixed one for herself. And how she would help her during her horse riding lessons when she was able. Or when she would fold over the pages in the catalogs that they got of the things that she thought Lizzie might like. 

She missed how she’d cover her over with a blanket every time that she fell asleep on the couch because she worried about her getting cold. And the way that she urged for Tommy to do things with her on their own every once in a while, be it just them or with the kids, even though Lizzie knew that it hurt her to see them all together like that. 

Yes, they had clashed a lot. Even more so than usual, as of late. But they did have some good times mixed in there. 

She passed a hand over her eyes, swallowing down tears. Tommy had said that he probably wouldn’t be home tonight. She hadn’t been able to muster any disappointment at the news. Only deep relief. He had become unbearable to be around. But in a different way than he had been before. Prior, they had always been fighting. But now, he just seemed so…sad. With Lucy around he was still Tommy, with his closed off expressions and gruff words, but his eyes were a bit softer. And he smiled more, even if they were just subtle little quirking upwards of his lips. 

“Mommy?” Ruby asked, glancing up at Lizzie from where she was seated on the floor. Lizzie looked down at her.

“Yes, my darling?”

“Where’s Lucy?”

Her throat went dry. The children had asked her several times where Lucy was, and she had never been able to give them a straight answer, unable to bring herself to tell them that she likely was never coming back.

“She’s away at work, sweetheart, remember?”

“Is she coming back?”

Lizzie hesitated. “I don’t know, honey.”

Ruby returned her gaze to her doll. “I hope she comes back.”

Lizzie cocked her head. “Why’s that?”

When Ruby looked up at her, her wide dark eyes were filled with wisdom far beyond her age.

“Because Daddy’s happy when she’s here.”

∗ ∗ ∗

“Hey, do me a favor?” he asked Ada. “When that kid of yours arrives, keep it away from me,” he turned before he could really see Ada’s reaction from her place seated on the steps, heading for the door.

“Tommy,” Ada called out. He turned back. She was worrying at her bottom lip nervously, eyes darting about a moment before focusing back up at him. “I heard that Lucy left you.”

“She didn’t…leave me,” Tommy said, hoping that he was successfully able to hide his wince at the word. “She’s just not living at Arrow House anymore.” He narrowed his eyes. “Who told you?”

“Arthur mentioned it.”

He shook his head. Looked down at his feet. Arthur and his big fucking mouth. “You can say it.”

“Say what?”

“Say that you’re surprised that it took me this long to fuck things up with her.”

“That wasn't what I was thinking.”

“Yeah, well, then you’d be the only one,” it came out bitter, the taste unpleasant on his tongue.

“Tommy…” his sister started and then just sighed, shoulders slumping. “I’m sorry.”

“Mm. Good-night, Ada.” 

He walked back to the apartment miserably, opening the door to be greeted with a dark entryway and an equally dimmed sitting room. He pulled off his cap and stuffed it into his pocket, taking off his coat and hanging it up on the hook next to Lucy’s. 

He found her curled up on her side in bed, already asleep. He changed out of his clothes in a daze, sliding into the open space beside her. For a moment he just stared at her. Taking in the soft material of her silk maroon negligee, red hair spread out on the white pillow. 

He wanted very badly to wrap his arms around her. To hold her against his chest like he had almost every other night they had shared a bed. But he didn’t know if she wanted that. Any attempt he had made over the last few days to bridge the growing gap between them had only seemed to succeed in her pushing him even further away. He didn’t know what to do.

He wasn’t sure what it was Lucy really wanted anymore. It had been her idea to leave. Perhaps she had finally realized what he was: a monster that corrupted and ruined everything he’d ever touched. 

∗ ∗ ∗ 

When he woke up, it was to find that Lucy was no longer beside him. 

He reached out, half asleep, only to find her side of the bed cool to the touch. Frowning, he raised his head, blinking open his heavy eyelids and squinting in the dark of the room. No light was sneaking in through the curtains. It was still night outside.  

“Luce?” he mumbled. The ensuite washroom door was open, the light off. No Lucy there. 

Pushing himself up, he felt a frown twist his lips downwards. Did she so badly want to get away from him that she’d gone and slept in the other room?

His eyes finally landed on the sliver of golden light sneaking in through the crack under the door. Head cocking, he climbed out of bed, snatching up one of his white henley’s and pulling it on over his naked torso. The fuck was she doing out in the sitting room in the middle of the night?

He found her sitting on the couch, the lamp on the end table flicked on. For a moment, he didn’t entirely understand what she was doing. Her back was curved forward, both arms bent so that her hands were reaching backwards towards her shoulder blades. As he watched, her hands flexed, scratching and pressing at her skin, as if trying to massage it. A little whimper emitted from her throat. 

Then he understood. 

He should have guessed that this would happen. It had been raining pretty hard when he visited Ada’s, and the cold and wet always seemed to make Lucy’s shoulders act up. Plus he had to figure that the mattress she was sleeping on at Charlie’s wasn’t all that good for her back, either.

He wished she would let him at least get her a suite at the Midland to stay at. Even if just for herself. 

Hurrying around the couch, he sat down beside her, hands reaching for her shoulders to try to help. 

But at the first brush of his palms across her back, she jumped and jerked away. 

“N-no…” Her face whipped around to stare at him, and he was met with distraught, teary dark eyes. The very sight was enough to hurt him to his core. 

“I can help,” he said, half begging. 

She sniffled and wiped at her nose with the back of her hand. “I can handle it–”

“I know you can,” he told her gently. “But you don’t have to.” He saw something waver across her face, his hands reaching tentatively out for her again. “Please, let me help you.” Don’t make me sit by and watch you suffer through this on your own too.

Her bottom lip trembled a little, eyes searching his, and then her shoulders slumped, face angling towards the ground while she nodded in consent. Moving slowly, half afraid she would spook again, Tommy rested both hands on her back. He started up rubbing at her skin slowly, searching out the spots that he knew always gave her the most trouble. 

Lucy let out a deep breath, and he felt her relax a little under his hands. 

At least I can do this for her.

“There you go,” he said quietly. “It’s alright. I’ve got you.”

She let out another little hiccupping sob. He wasn’t sure if it was in relief over the pain being lessened, or from his words. Either way, he shifted a little closer to her. 

“Did you take your pain killers?” The doctor had given her a prescription to use in the event that the pains ever got especially bad. 

She nodded. “Haven’t kicked in yet.”

He sat there rubbing her shoulders for a good thirty minutes, until her spasmed muscles had relaxed and the pain medications started to do their job.

“Let’s go back to bed, eh?”

Lucy wiped at her eyes. “Okay.” 

She let him shepherd her back into the bedroom, curling up on top of the mattress, watching him flick off the lights and get in next to her, pulling the blanket up to tuck around her. 

“Sorry,” she whispered, after they’d both been still for a moment. Tommy stared at the outline of her next to him in the dark. Tentatively, he reached out, stroking his hand through her hair.

“It’s alright.”

∗ ∗ ∗ 

“Lucy!” 

She turned, smiling and scrunching her nose at the two little figures running towards her. She stooped, bending down to press a kiss to Charlie and Ruby’s foreheads.

“Hey kiddos,” she squatted down to their level. “How’ve you been? Have you been good?”

Ruby nodded her head as her voice chirped out a sweet little, “yes.” 

At the same time, Charlie cast her a mischievous look. “No.”

“No!? What do you mean, no!?” Lucy cried playfully, reaching around to tickle the boy's sides while he squealed. He looked so much like Tommy when he laughed, it was almost frightening. She pulled the two children in for a hug. “I gotta get back to work, okay? But you two have fun with your mum and dad, alright?”

The children whined but relented, Ruby shuffling back to grab onto Tommy’s hand while he smiled softly down at her. Lizzie ruffled Charlie’s hair affectionately, expression loving as she looked at her step-son. Lucy smiled at her awkwardly.

“Good to see you.”

Lizzie nodded, eyes not quite meeting hers. “You too.”

“Right,” she looked at Tommy. “I gotta go help Adam with paperwork.”

He nodded, expression difficult to read, though she thought that she could see a regretful glimmer enter his eyes when he looked at her. “Alright.”

She nodded in return, waving and flashing a smile at Charlie and Ruby before ducking away. Watching from her desk, she looked on as Tommy ushered his children and Lizzie out of the office. He and Lizzie were both sporting wide smiles. Lucy huffed out a breath, nodding to herself. Good. That was good. They were happier now. Finally at peace with their little family.

Now if only her heart would stop hurting. 

∗ ∗ ∗   

They met with McCavern that evening along with Uncle Charlie to confirm the plan for distribution of the opium.

“Now who’s this fine lady?” McCavern asked when he spotted her, eyes shining in the lights of the lanterns as he looked her over. 

Lucy smiled thinly, taking his hand and shaking it when Tommy introduced them. What the fuck was it with these fascists and their constant leering?

She took a seat next to Charlie, listening to Tommy deal with McCavern. He was bad, that much was obvious to her, even without taking into account what he’d done to Bonnie. But he didn’t make her skin crawl as much as Mosley did. So that was something. Unlike Mosley he was just loud and obnoxious.

Tommy and McCavern shook on their deal, and Tommy poured them all a drink.

“In the firelight, your hair looks like the color of blood, love,” McCavern whispered in her ear, breath tickling her neck as he leaned down to pick up his cup. Lucy tensed, fingers tightening around her own mug. McCavern chuckled and pulled away. From across the table, Tommy’s jaw tightened, clearly having taken notice of the encounter.

But he said nothing. 

She understood why. McCavern was volatile; their peace pact fragile. He couldn’t be risking upending that all just over a half flirtatious remark.  

But still, it stung. 

Maybe he didn’t really see her as someone worth expending the effort to protect anymore. 

“You’ll use the cheque guarantee from Mosley to officially connect him to McCavern,” she guessed after McCavern and his men had left. 

“Yeah.”

She nodded, raising her drink to her lips.

“I’m going inside,” Charlie announced, standing. He gave Lucy a pat on the shoulder as he passed her and they said their goodnights. And then it was just her and Tommy again. 

Tommy cleared his throat. “Are you still coming to the ballet tomorrow evening?”

She swiped a hand across her face. It was Lizzie’s birthday tomorrow, and in celebration, he was having a private ballet company come to his house to put on a production of Swan Lake. A ballet about love, apparently.

A particularly paranoid part of her brain wondered if they’d chosen a romantic ballet specifically to rub her nose in it. 

Jealousy pulsed through her. Lizzie always got the big, grand public displays of love and affection. She got to go to fancy theater productions with him, and expensive restaurants. When he won awards and made speeches, she often got mentioned by name in his thanks towards those who had helped him get where he had in life. And at every lavish function, she got to be on his arm.

Even before she’d moved out, Lucy had always been relegated to the shadows. Their relationship could never be known publicly. Their dinner dates were at home, where no one could see them. Or maybe the rare picnic out in the wilderness. Assuming they had the time for dates at all. He’d never be able to throw an extravagant party in her honor.

Looking down at her hands, she frowned. “Wasn’t sure if I was still invited.”

Tommy looked at her sharply. “Of course you're invited.”

“I’d hate to ruin Lizzie’s birthday with my presence.”

“You won’t. She knows you’re invited.” His brows pinched. “She made sure that an invitation got sent to you herself.”

The furrow in Lucy’s brow only deepened. Why the fuck would she do that? Maybe she was trying to remind her of her place. To make sure that she saw the massive effort that Tommy had gone to for her.  

“I don’t want you to feel like you have to come if you really don’t want to, but…” Tommy wetted his lips, looking uncomfortable. 

“Mosley’s coming,” she finished for him. 

“Yes.”

“And you want me to come babysit him.”

“Not…babysit. But I might need you for any business we may conduct while he’s there.”

Of course. He didn’t want her there to enjoy herself. He wanted her there to work. Silly her. 

God, when did you get so bitter? she asked herself, cringing at her thoughts.

“I’ll be there. Don’t worry.”

Tommy exhaled. “Thank you.”

“Mhm.”

“I might not be able to come pick you up with all the preparations that need to happen, but I’ll send a driver.”

“Don’t bother. I’ll ask Polly if she can drive me.”

His brows shot up nearly to his hairline. “You want to ride to Warwickshire with Polly?”

“Want is a strong word. But it’ll free up one of your drivers to go pick up some of the other guests. Besides, she’s been a little nicer to me lately. I think Aberama’s been putting in a good word for me.”

He examined her for a long time. “If that’s what you're comfortable with.”

She nodded. 

They stayed there for a while, both looking out towards the darkness of the canal. 

“I need to be getting back,” Tommy sighed. His hands had slipped into his pockets at some point. 

“Okay.” 

He made a move as if to approach her, then stopped. The soft glow of the lanterns cast sharp shadows across his face. She could just barely make out the reflection in his eyes. 

“Good night, then.”

Before she could reply, he started to walk away, the darkness that surrounded them seeming to swallow him up once he passed the touch of the lanterns. 

She stared out into the dark. 

No kiss. No I love you. No touch.

“Good night,” she whispered. Even though he was already gone.

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[bowsnstrings]

Mikasa and Milana cruised down the highway, the early afternoon sun casting a soft, golden glow over the landscape as they went inland to the city. They’d been talking about this spa day for weeks, a long overdue escape from their hectic lives. The stresses of school, work, family, and all the unnecessary fighting had built up in ways they hadn’t even fully realized until now.

“Do you think they’ll actually be able to fix my back?” Mikasa asked, wincing as she shifted in the passenger seat. The knot in her shoulders had been there for days, maybe weeks, and nothing seemed to help.

“If anyone can, it’s this place,” Milana replied, glancing at her friend as she applied a coat of oil to her puckered lips. “My Grandma swears by it. She says they do more than just massages- they’re practically miracle workers.”

Mikasa chuckled, shaking her head. “Well, I’m up for a miracle. I feel like I’m about to collapse into a pile of bones every time I walk. I can't believe it's been so long since we had a real girls day.” She said, a smile tugging at her lips as she exited, pulling her sunglasses back to see the street ahead.

“I know!” Milana agreed, looking through the window with a content humm. “We both need this. I’m so ready to forget about everything. Just relax.”

Mikasa shot her a side glance, her hands steady on the wheel. “Especially after everything you've been dealing with, right?” Milana’s gaze softened, and she nodded. She appreciated Mikasa’s understanding, how she never pushed her to talk, but also how she was always ready to listen when Milana was ready to share.

The last few days had been better, especially after talking things out with Ony. Milana’s mind briefly wandered back to that evening at the party, but now she could only blush as everything circled back to what happened afterwards. Getting through everything made things so much better between them, and now all they’d been doing was being honest and open with each other while making up for all the hurt. The spa today was his idea too, a way to feel better physically and mentally, convincing her quickly as he kissed her cheek sweetly.

She was happy to take his advice, the car humming steadily as they navigated their way through the sleek, modern district. Tall glass buildings glittered in the fading sunlight, and the streets bustled with the usual evening rush. After a few turns, they arrived at the spa; a contemporary, minimalist space that promised luxury and tranquility, with its large glass windows and welcoming wooden doors. Milana sighed as they stepped out of her friend's vehicle, stretching her arms above her head as her purse dangled over her shoulder.

Inside the building, the air was warm and lightly scented with lavender. The receptionist, a woman with long blonde hair and a soft smile, greeted them immediately. “Welcome! How can we help you today?” Mikasa explained that they had reservations, and she perked up even further. “We’ve been expecting you. Your rooms are ready. Follow me, please.” Milana followed Mikasa through the elegantly decorated hall, with the sound of soft music floating from hidden speakers.

Everything was designed to induce a sense of peace. There were no phones, no distractions, only the promise of relaxation. She felt herself unwinding with every step. As they passed through the last hallway and toward the treatment area, Milana noticed a wooden door at the end of the corridor, slightly ajar. She curiously watched it open, wanting to see if that was the changing area when her eyes met the last person she expected—Sasha.

The two locked eyes, and an awkward silence stretched between them. Milana's throat tightened, the weight of their recent fight still lingering in the back of her mind. Sasha cleared her throat, a half-smile tugging at her lips. “Hey, Milana,” She greeted, her voice soft but unsure. Her brown hair wrapped up in a bun, the robe on her showing that she was here for the spa as well.

Milana forced a smile, trying to suppress the uncomfortable tension rising in her chest. “Oh… hey, Sasha. Didn't expect to see you here.” She tried not to seem like she wasn’t happy to see her friend, of course she was, but things were just a little tense right now.

Sasha shifted, clearly just as unsure about the situation. “Oh… Mikasa said you’d be excited.” Both of them turned towards Mikasa, looking less than impressed at her little scheme as she only shrugged, looking unusually calm for someone who knew about the rift between her two friends.

Milana frowned, trying to process the underlying meaning behind Sasha's words. “So, Mikasa… knew you'd be here?” She asked, her voice a little sharper than she intended.

Sasha shrugged, glancing back at Mikasa. “I guess she’s been keeping an eye on things.” Her tone was neutral, but there was a hint of something else, maybe frustration, maybe a trace of guilt, Milana couldn’t quite tell.

“Right,” She mumbled quietly, the hurt from their last argument still echoing in her chest. She had hoped that things would smooth over by now, but it was clear that the damage had stuck, even if they had made up. Sasha hesitated, her lips parting as if she wanted to say more but wasn’t sure how. They both shifted to Mikasa, who hadn’t moved, but there was an unreadable expression on her face.

“I guess we'll go get relaxed, then.” Mikasa said cheerfully, the tone a lot happier than what either of them would expect. Milana decided to just follow after her, entering the room Sasha came out of as her mind swirled with the thought of what came next.

The door sounded softly as it closed behind them. The familiar, soothing scent of calming essential oils in the air, but it did little to calm the uneasy knot in her stomach. She moved toward an open locker, her mind elsewhere, focused on the discomfort that still lingered between her and Sasha.

As she began to change into her robe, she couldn’t help but replay the events of the past few days. Her fingers fumbled with the fabric as the weight of their disagreement weighed heavy. She hadn’t expected to find herself here, stuck in this awkward limbo with her best friend, not after everything they’d been through.

Sasha had always been the person Milana could talk to about anything. They went through it all together growing up in school, they shared the ups and downs, the fights, and the laughter. But now they were out of step, and all because her friend couldn’t see how good her boyfriend was to her. It felt like a wall had gone up between them, and no matter how much they tried to patch things up, it was still there, making every interaction strained and awkward. Even though neither of them wanted to acknowledge that.

Milana tugged the robe tighter around her body, her eyes unfocused as she looked at her reflection in the locker room mirror, her expression a mix of frustration and confusion. Mikasa was beside her, calmly folding her clothes, unaffected by the tension that had been growing in the air.

“Why didn’t you tell me Sasha was coming?” Milana’s voice was annoyed, though she tried to keep it low, aware of the other guests around them. “I mean, you don’t even agree with her, and you didn’t think I deserved a heads-up?”

Mikasa paused for a moment, her back still turned as she organized her things. She exhaled softly before responding in her usual steady, calm tone. “Because you would’ve acted way more awkward about it, Lana.” She said simply put, not meeting Milana's gaze. “I don’t want to force you into making up, but I think it’s for the best.”

Milana’s eyes narrowed, her hands resting on her hips. “But you knew how weird it would be. I barely made up with her the first time, and now I’m stuck trying to act like everything’s fine when it’s not?”

Mikasa finally turned to face her, her expression unwavering. “I know it’s not easy,” She said, her voice steady but not apologetic. “But if you’re upset with her then talk it out. No more of this, ‘I’ll just hide until the problem is solved’ mentality. No one can fix things for you, Milana. You need to confront it yourself.” She glanced toward the door, her eyes softening just slightly. “I didn’t want to put you in an uncomfortable situation, but now that she’s here, just talk to her.”

The words hit Milana harder than she expected. There was a sting of truth in them, and like always Mikasa wasn’t wrong. She did need to face Sasha, no matter how uncomfortable it was. This wasn’t something anyone else could fix for her, and avoiding it wasn’t an option. “Ugh,” Milana muttered, leaning against the locker. “I guess you’re right, but it still doesn’t make it easier.”

Mikasa gave her a small, encouraging smile. “You’ll be fine. Don’t stress about it, we’re at a spa for God’s sake.” Milana exhaled, feeling a little more grounded now. She wasn’t sure what would come next with Sasha, but Mikasa had made one thing clear: it was her turn to take the step.

If she truly wanted to make things right, it had to come from her, no one else. With a final, lingering look at Mikasa, Milana grabbed her towel, determined to face the next challenge, whatever that might be.

During the mud wraps, the silence between them was deafening. The spa attendants spread the thick, cool sludge over their bodies, massaging it gently as the relaxing music played in the background. Mikasa was lying next to Milana, but every time she glanced at Sasha from two beds over she could see the same careful distance, the same hesitation.

Milana kept her eyes closed, breathing deeply to focus on the calming noises and sensations happening, trying her best to lose herself in the experience. Her mind wandered, thinking of the most random things to stop trying to focus on what she should say to Sasha. Her fingers tapped against the side of the chair and she felt her friends looking towards her, trying to at least enjoy this experience for just a few minutes longer.

When the mud was finally washed away and they were wrapped in soft towels, Milana’s mind was still racing. Sasha’s quiet presence felt like a heavy weight in the room, and she was doing everything in her power to ignore it. But Mikasa was watching, and she wasn’t about to let her friends wallow in her avoidance for much longer.

Milana reached for the treatment plan list left on the side table next to her, reading through some of the things they offered. One particularly caught her eye, especially since she had an obsession with keeping her skin smooth and silky. “Should I get a wax?” She asked aloud, thinking momentarily about how she’d look completely bare.

She had a has a wax pot at home for her underarms and legs, but usually she shaved downstairs. That hadn’t been done in some weeks though, and she was getting tired of how hard she had to work between her legs. Mikasa had laughed softly, breaking her from her train of thought and smiled at her.

“Do it, your boyfriend might not want anything between him and his meal.” Milana rolled her eyes, pushing her away as Mikasa leaned in, wiggling her tongue at her annoyingly. She told her to shut up, before falling back into silence, noticing Sasha was about to speak up.

She cleared her throat, trying to keep her voice casual. “Do you really think he cares about stuff like that?” Sasha’s voice felt tight, like the words were too big to come out as easily as she wanted.

Milana blinked, the sudden shift in the conversation not lost on her. “What do you mean?” She set the paper aside, now giving Sasha her full attention.

Sasha shifted uncomfortably in her chair, rubbing the back of her neck. She wanted to say something, to explain that she wasn’t trying to be judgmental, but the words kept slipping away. “I just… I don’t know. Is he being superficial about that?” She muttered, looking down at her hands.

“No. He hasn’t even seen me down there to know what’s going on.” She tried to be playful about it like they used to, but it didn’t go with the moment, Sasha just sighing and fiddling with her hair.

“Good that’s good.” It didn’t sound good, not when the words hung in the air, heavier than she had intended. Milana huffed, turning to face her friend, expression filled with hurt and frustration too. The distance between them had only grown since that last argument, and Sasha knew it.

“Look,” She exhaled slowly, her voice calmer than before. “Sasha, I know you’re not a fan of Ony. But I want you to understand… he’s not like that. He’s not gonna hurt me or anything, he just wants to take care of me. I know you probably heard the worst of him when he was running around with Eren, but he’s a good person.” Milana met her gaze, and for a moment, Sasha felt the weight of their unresolved conflict. “I care about him, and I just want you to see that.”

Sasha’s heart squeezed, wanting to believe her friend, really, she did. But there was still a part of her that saw Ony, especially since Connie told her all about him. He grew up in the Graves for crying out loud, the birthplace of thugs, killers, and worse. With his occupation too, it was only making her more fearful. The thought of losing her best friend over this was terrifying, but Sasha didn’t want to sit back and stay silent, either.

“I know you care about him, Milana,” Sasha said, her voice quieter now. “But sometimes I feel like he’s just… he’s not the best for you. I just want you to be happy and safe, you know?”

There it was, the elephant in the room, the thing Sasha had been trying to say for weeks. The thing that had driven a wedge between them. Milana exhaled softly, then stood up and walked over to Sasha. There was no anger in her expression, no defensiveness. Instead, Milana sat down next to her friend, looking her in the eyes.

“I know you’re worried,” Milana said, her voice gentle now. “And I know I’ve been stubborn about this. But, Sasha… I value your opinion more than you know. You’ve always been there for me. I don’t want to lose you over this, and I know I’ve been kind of… pushing you away with all the Ony talk.”

Sasha’s breath caught in her throat, and she had to blink a few times to clear the sudden lump in her throat. “You’re my best friend, Milana,” She whispered truthfully, her emotions getting the better of her. “I just want to make sure you’re not being… hurt.”

Milana’s eyes softened, and she gave Sasha a small, appreciative smile. “I get it, and I hear you. I’ll be mindful of that. But I promise you, I’m happy with Ony. I know he’d never do anything besides keep me safe and happy. I just… I need you to trust me on that.”

Sasha felt the tension in her chest slowly begin to loosen. The fear, the anxiety about losing Milana, started to dissolve with every word. “I trust you, Lana,” She replied, her voice finally steady again. “I just want you to be sure. You’re my best friend. I’ll always have your back.”

Milana reached out and gave Sasha a hug, one that felt like a quiet promise. “And I’ll always have yours,” She whispered right to her, squeezing tight.

Mikasa, who had been sitting quietly through the exchange, finally spoke up with a playful grin. “Okay, okay. Enough emotional bonding for today, ladies. We’re at the spa, remember? Who’s getting a massage, and who’s getting their wax?”

Sasha chuckled, the tension now fully lifted. “I think I’ll stick with the massage,” She said, nudging Milana gently. “But you should definitely go for the wax, Milana, I wanna see how cute it’ll look.”

Milana rolled her eyes but grinned. “In your dreams heifer.” She stuck her tongue out, jumping back when Sasha leaned in trying to give her a kiss in retaliation. “Stop, I liked you better when you were trying to kiss Connie, not me.” That had all of them laughing, enjoying the rest of their relaxing time, at least until an hour later.

Sasha, Milana, and Mikasa all shuffled out of their respective rooms, moving toward different corners of the locker room mirrors, still feeling the after effects of their treatments. Milana was the first to take a peek down her robe, her face flushed and a little sheepish but clearly proud. Her movements slow and deliberate as she walks with an exaggerated waddle, clearly aware of the tender skin beneath.

Mikasa followed suit, adjusting her robe with a mischievous grin. “I swear, with the way we’re walking right now, we look like those women beat our asses.” She joked, glancing over at Milana.

Sasha, releasing the tension of their earlier conversation, couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of the three of them waddling side by side. “Honestly, I never thought I'd be admiring a bare cooch, but here we are.”

Milana shot Sasha a playful glance. “You’re telling me you don’t love this right now?” She teased, raising an eyebrow and turning slightly as if to show off her fresh wax.

Sasha raised her hands in mock surrender. “I’m just glad I didn’t have to go through what you did. I’m still sore just watching you!”

“Well, it's worth it!” Milana exclaimed with a wink. “You have no idea how satisfying it feels to be completely bare. I’m going to glide through the rest of my day… like a dolphin.”

The three of them reached the row of full-length benches near the lounge area, and they all paused to relax after the pain. Sasha turned to Mikasa. "So, Mika, how’s your skin? Feel like a new woman?"

Mikasa looked back down her robe before, snickering at what she saw. “You know what? Not bad. Not bad at all. I might actually enjoy being this smooth, and I think girls will like it too.”

Milana, grinning, sidled up next to Mikasa as she checked out her own reflection. “It’s like I’m a different person. I feel so sleek, you guys.” She gave her skin a little tap, as if admiring the baby-soft texture.

Sasha shot her a playful look. “Yeah, you feel different ‘cause that lady ripped off skin.”

“And cobwebs.” Mikasa added in as they both giggled, leaning into each other.

“Ha, Ha.” Milana mock-scowled, but then couldn’t help bursting out laughing. “Do not start though, I might’ve had cobwebs, but y’all each had about ten pounds of hair to shed.”

Mikasa, always the neutral party, just grinned as she ran a hand over her own skin. “At least we look like a bunch of models now. But seriously, it’s like we’ve all been reborn. Smooth skin, refreshed souls, good vibes. Spa days for the win.”

Sasha scooted back a little, still smiling, wanting to see her other friend too as she spoke. “I’m glad we did this together,” She said, glancing between Milana and Mikasa. “Even if I’ll never go through the pain again, it feels nice to just… enjoy each other’s company.”

Milana turned to her, her expression softening. “Yeah, I’m glad we’re all here, too. I know things have been a little weird with us, but this—today—feels good, right? Just us three. No drama, no stress.”

Sasha nodded, feeling the weight of their earlier conversation but also the warmth of the friendship that had never truly gone away. “Yeah, it feels really good.” The three of them sat there for a moment, admiring their smooth skin in the mirrors, the awkwardness of the past slowly slipping away as they focused on what mattered most, finding ice packs for their coochies.

Ony stepped through the spa’s glass doors, scanning the room for Milana, looking a bit out of place with his imposing figure. People were walking around him, trying to avoid his hardened gaze as he stood waiting. It wasn’t hard to spot her, as she came from a back room, her expression a little more relaxed than it had been earlier. As soon as their eyes met, her face softened into a smile, liting up as a sense of comfort returned to her.

“Hey,” She greeted him with a long hug, her voice light and filled with warmth after all the relaxation she endured. “Thanks for picking me up.”

Ony grinned, his tall frame swaying them slightly, rocking them back and forth as he held her for a moment, his arms wrapping around her in that familiar, loving way. “Hey, beautiful,” He whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. The gentleness of his embrace felt like the perfect antidote to soothe her soreness away.

As he pulled back, his eyes shifted to the two girls standing a little further off, Sasha and Mikasa. He couldn’t help but notice Sasha immediately stiffening at his presence. Her smile was tight, polite, but there was a clear tension in her posture, as though she didn’t know how to act around him after their earlier exchanges.

Milana noticed, too, but she gave Sasha an apologetic look before turning back to Ony. “How was the spa day?” His tone easy as he directed it over to the two, watching them linger awkwardly, exchanging glances.

Sasha’s expression faltered slightly at the sight of Ony, and she shifted on her feet, her usual ease with him slipping into something more uncomfortable. “Uh, hey, Ony,” She coughed out, a little too casually, as though unsure how to act after everything that had happened between them. “It was good.”

Ony noticed the awkwardness immediately, raising an eyebrow. He didn’t mention it, though, just giving Sasha a friendly nod. As he let go of Milana, he leaned down to give her a kiss to her lips, pecking softly, mindful of the fact that she was around her friends before walking towards the reception desk.

“Hey, how much?” He casually pulled out his wallet, his movements smooth and unhurried, and handed the spa receptionist his card.

“For her, just-”

“Nah, sorry. For all three.” That had everyone in the room perking up, especially considering the amount he had to pay to cover their entire day. Milana’s eyes widened in surprise. “Ony, you don’t have to-”

“It’s my pleasure, Ma.” Ony threw her a casual smile, happy seeing the way Sasha was beaming too. “Consider it a small gesture. You’re Milana’s friends, and I’m all for showing appreciation.” His voice had a playful but sincere tone as he glanced at Sasha, his smile not wavering.

Sasha’s awkwardness deepened, but she couldn’t help but smile back at his charm. “You’re sure?” She asked, still a little hesitant. “You know Connie doesn’t mind the extra charge on his card.” That at least got them to laugh things off a little.

“Positive,” Ony replied smoothly. “Just happy you’ve all been there for Milana, and that's worth something.” His eyes softened as he looked at his girl, watching her practically melt at his sweetness. Mikasa, who had been quietly observing, spoke up with a quiet but appreciative smile.

“Well, I can’t turn down a free spa day. That’s really kind of you, Ony.”

“It’s nothing,” He said it with a light shrug, swiping his card with no hesitation. “Glad you guys had fun.”

Sasha, still a bit unsure, relaxed slightly, her tension easing just enough to give Ony a grateful nod. “Well, if you insist… I guess we can’t say no.”

Milana, watching the interaction, felt a surge of gratitude for Ony’s generosity. The tension from earlier seemed to dissipate, replaced by a more comfortable atmosphere, though a sense of unease still lingered just beneath the surface, especially for Sasha.

“You’re amazing,” Milana said quietly to Ony, reaching to grasp his hand, the warmth of his gesture making her feel lighter. He held her back, pulling her into him to sling his arm around her, smiling all teasingly.

“Anything for you,” He replied, sincere with his radiant smile beaming down at her, then he turned back toward the door. “Alright, let’s get out of here. If you smile any wider I’ll start paying for other people’s massages.”

The girls nodded, laughing at his joke as they all waddled slightly behind him. It wasn’t all resolved, but with Ony’s thoughtful gesture, the heavy atmosphere was beginning to shift toward something a little more comfortable. And as they left the spa together, Milana couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief, even if the lingering tension with Sasha hadn’t disappeared completely. At least, for now, they were all in a better place.

More of Milana here 🎀